I am so very tired of this traveling shame show. I can’t take it any longer. It’s ridiculous.
So many of us wandering around not happy with who we are, not comfortable in our own skin, swearing we will finally celebrate our lives when we finally do that one next thing.
When does it end?
It ends when we end it. It ends when we clear the emotional debris and try a self-celebratory way of being on for size. Not when someone’s love for us hands us back our self-worth, but when we decide to on our own terms.
Many of us go through our whole lives not loving ourselves for one minute. This has to stop. Lets stop it. Lets practice self-love. A little more every day.
Balance between being Love and being asshole … I may have finally arrived.
What is balance exactly?
I was reminded of a single portion of it, pertaining to my writing.
If I write 10 things about light and dark, I ought to balance it by writing 10 things about self.
Self is worthy of its own attention just as much as any other is worthy of our attention.
The focus is often too much on what is outside of self … indeed, this seems to be the norm. Many are unwilling to dwell on self. I do not mean being selfish, want want want. I mean focus on the inside, what makes us tick, what does our inner child have to say, what care may we be neglecting for self?
The thoughts … are they always upon another, or others, or some thing?
Attention is the most valuable currency any form of life possesses, and ALl life has it. ALL life spends it. We give it away, here and there, yet how often does one actually sit with self and ponder what brings happiness, love and peace … to ones own life and mind?
There is plenty of chaos in this world, and most people are focused there, completely avoiding, or missing self-care.
I know, for I am one, and I see it everywhere I place my attention.
My current self-imposed task is to reign in my attention once more. To find balance, the balance that has gone catawonky.
It is give and receive.
We may be of service to others, and must balance it with service to self. Physical actions, mental efforts … not only do we give, but we are responsible for the receive … not any other person. WE give to others, WE must give to self.
If someone is demanding you give and give, and does not reciprocate, yet demands also that you never take time for self … these must be released … it is a form of vampirism.
Remembering to give to self, to care for and love self, seems to have become a lost art.
Mastering balance … it’s a challenge which requires continual conscious effort.
If the mind wanders there, pull it back to here for a time.
If it is focused on everything that is wrong, then it must also focus on everything that is right. Equal portions, in the same day.
Old habits are difficult to release.
Creating the new replacement patterns, ones that are of deeper benefit to health in body and mind more of a challenge.
Check in with body and mind and see what they say.
I was so grateful to wake this morning and to be able to share my midnight thoughts (in an earlier post).
Eyes wide open, my fur kids came in for the Love, and a bit of play before breakfast time.
I have a very nice, relaxed job I have the privilege of working, my co-workers are great people with little to no negativity, and I have opportunity to play music in my ‘office’ … Love songs … so good. I especially like to listen to men sing Love songs … melts my heart …
I’ve ordered Zentangle supplies and will get my artsy self going in creating something beautiful. I find myself humming a little tune when I do this, and my mind relaxes after a day of crunching numbers at work.
I am grateful for friends who seem to always be sharing uplifting messages and words of Love and Care … they make my new habit formation (Attitude of Gratitude) that much easier.
It is only Wednesday, but I’m dreaming of this weekend already when I will gather with those I Love, sharing care and a meal and prayer to Creator through the drum, representative of the heartbeat of the Earth, our GAIA. This brings a smile to my face, as I ponder what tasty dish to bring and share with my Soul Family.
Another Love song ….. oh, my beating heart …
Thank you to the men who are so generous with their emotions, with their Love. I am ever so grateful for you.
When I need Love …. I just close my eyes …. and there you are.
I received a ride to work thru Uber this morning from a man who came to the states from Africa.
We discussed Bill Gates and the vaccination of people in Africa, and how I thought this was complete bullshite. He mentioned they are developing their own medicines and that the root of all medicines come from Africa.
I mentioned that according to genealogy, all life has its roots in Africa.
We discussed the riots, called protests. We talked about small business owners having their life’s work destroyed in a single night … business owners of all ethnic backgrounds.
We talked about many of these so-called protesters being from out of state, shipped in by bus, paid money (by someone(s) to cause chaos in the cities.
We talked about the children and how they respond to him, open of heart, willing to accept without judgement. We talked of their parents and their ability to mimic their children’s perceptions of acceptance and care.
When he dropped me at my location I tipped him. He said he was going to get tea, that he loved tea. I mentioned I do too.
He told me I made his day, already, in this early morning.
And that made me so happy.
There is so much value in the heart of all living beings … it has absolutely no-thing to do with gender or race … it is the heart of creation, and we all share it.
Crea, Crea, Crea …..
Bless you my beautiful friends.
May you be recognized today by another aspect of life, may your intrinsic contribution to the whole be honored, as it should.
May we unite as a single organism with many parts making up the whole.
At 40, Franz Kafka (1883-1924), who never married and had no children, walked through the park in Berlin when he met a girl who was crying because she had lost her favorite doll. She and Kafka searched for the doll unsuccessfully.
Kafka told her to meet him there the next day and they would come back to look for her.
The next day, when they had not yet found the doll, Kafka gave the girl a letter “written” by the doll saying “please don’t cry. I took a trip to see the world. I will write to you about my adventures.”
Thus began a story which continued until the end of Kafka’s life. During their meetings, Kafka read the letters of the doll carefully written with adventures and conversations that the girl found adorable.
Finally, Kafka brought back the doll (he bought one) that had returned to Berlin. “It doesn’t look like my doll at all,” said the girl. Kafka handed her another letter in which the doll wrote: “my travels have changed me.” the little girl hugged the new doll and brought her happy home.
A year later Kafka died.
Many years later, the now-adult girl found a letter inside the doll. In the tiny letter signed by Kafka it was written: “Everything you love will probably be lost, but in the end, love will return in another way.”
Coming into love for self is a challenge, for most of we have been taught that to consider self as deserving or sacred is selfish …. that we ought to think of others before self.
As the training goes, and as experience tells us, when we deplete our inner resources by constantly filling anothers cup (or others), our own cup becomes depleted.
From a state of depletion, depression occurs, anger happens, even hopelessness …..
The selfless, nurturing the selfish …. it is a form of vampirism that we all participate in, or have at one time.
The human must do what is necessary to ensure the personal, inner cup always be in a state of overflow in order to share, and fill, others cups.
This means self-care is crucial to our existence. Self-love, self-respect, self-care …. taking time with GAIA … she always replenishes us.
Spending time in prayer … not as the church teaches it … but as our Soul and Spirit call us to do.
Yesterday I spent my day drumming, singing and dancing … men played out the heartbeat, drumming in unison, women stood behind them as all sang prayers to Creator for the health, happiness and well-being of our brothers and sisters, our family.
The energy was high, my body electrified as I danced around the drummers and singers, lifting the prayers to Creator, to the very heavens and all who hear.
We shared a community meal, we spoke to each other in a soft way, we listened to each other, leaving behind the chaos of the city … of the square world … and we spent the day in sacred union, one with another, in love, care, compassion.
Release was shared, and blessings given. Two exchanged feathers and their relationship will be observed by the family (all members) for one year and at the end of this time, if everyone approves of their care for one another, they will be wed in the sacred ceremony of the Cherokee.
Observe to what you apply your attention and energy to.
Will this situation benefit from my sacred care and contribution for wellness, for happiness?
Or will the receiver use it up and demand more without care or reciprocation?
Our time and attention are the currency of our Spirit, our Soul. It is the most precious gift you can impart to this world and life within it.
Be certain you pay yourself first.
Your cup must remain full, your mind, body, spirit and soul requires that you care for self prior to assisting others … if not, your capacity to do good dwindles, and you become vulnerable to all the negative side effects of an empty cup.
Do not think that someone will come along and fill it for you.
This is our personal responsibility.
So I implore you …. practice self-love and self-care.
Helping others will be so much easier and more powerful when you have plenty to share … and remember … self-care, self-love, is a continuous, evolving process.
It is time to develop new, healthier habits.
Release the old ways … recognize the Sacred in you.
Salt water taffy. Not good for the teeth or body. It’s artificial goodness similar to our addiction to certain relationships. We may love them, yet it does not change the fact that they be toxic for us. Sometimes, in epic proportions.
No One? Or ALL? Perhaps they are one and the same, opposing ends of the same polar scale, different expressions.
Our men are beautiful … our warriors, and our lovers. May peace and harmony and a sense of balance arrive for the masculine and feminine … in each person, and between physical gender ‘forms’.
If there is guilt in the mind and heart, it is the Souls request to behave in a different manner.
Watch the Cat
Your thoughts are Sacred, honor your mind.
Stubborn WILL sometimes gets in the way of humility. Obstinacy shuts doors and ends relationships … which is sometimes necessary, just as careful determination is.
Round and round we go, where we’ll wind up, nobody knows … because we never wind up anywhere, due to the constant cycle of upward momentum, experienced by all.
Be mindful of how you approach people in word or deed … the reciprocation will be according to effort given.
Life is a flow experience, constantly shifting and morphing into something, someone, new. When traits are seen in others, please know, these trait also reside in you … you would not recognize them otherwise. Once this is understood, it’s easier to hold compassion for those we encounter.
Observation is key. Not only of others, but of self, whether it is deemed a positive or a negative.
Everything that is wrong with this world is not just out there. When we accept responsibility for our output, either before, or after a brief tantrum, we can understand our progress in ‘process’.
Sometimes I feel like that crazy cat who runs up a tree chasing birds. Gotta talk myself down, get out of the tree and stand on the ground.
Remember to drink A LOT of WATER, especially tonight and this weekend …. energetic blockage release on the way … it’s @Zayan09949025 birthday gift/wish for humanity … and when she does this work, it’s powerful.