All posts tagged Body

Good-bye Fungus

Published February 24, 2019 by tindertender

In 1996 I camped all summer. I did not know I shouldn’t be wearing old tennis shoes in the river, and then leaving them on throughout the day. By the end of that year I noticed one of my toe nails growing thick. As the years rolled by I tried some things to get rid of whatever it was causing that, but nothing worked. (Now understood to be fungus).

Sometimes it takes me awhile to really get into the heart of things. With life throwing me curve ball after curve ball I did not focus on that toe nail, rather I attempted to hold life and house hold together, which took everything out of me after several years.

I began to study herbs and oils and I’m almost embarrassed to say, have just recently tackled with renewed vigor that toe nail. I’ve been putting tea tree oil on it, waiting a bit then dropping 99% pure dmso on it followed by a wrap.

I am excited to say that for the first time ever that toe nail has lifted off, and the grow out is healthy and normal. Geesh, 23 years to get it together enough to take care of the body. In my defense, I focused on the mental stuff first, so it’s not as bad as it may sound.

I share this here to let those who have found themselves with similar issue that it can be cured, it only takes steady persistence and the right ingredients.

How Would I Live If … ?

Published September 25, 2018 by tindertender

In this world there is so much chaos, it is difficult to get in touch with our inner self, our higher self, and to listen to what is there.

I recently treated myself to a ‘float’ in a deprivation tank. It was 80 minutes long and time ceased to exist. It’s amazing how it just seems to stop when the senses are not bombarded with outside stimulus.


As I lay there in a shallow pool of water with 8,000 lbs of epson salt, gravity had no power over me, my mind was still with the exception of silent prayers as violet light pulsed in the darkness.

St. Germaine is said to be the carrier of the violet flame of healing, and I choose to believe that is exactly what was, and is, taking place … a great healing.

My recent aura photo is quite yellow! There seems to be a bit of concern over whether I’m ‘grounded’, I can tell you that there is much happening ‘behind the scenes’.

There are many theories behind the meaning of this … here is what some say …

“Aura colors are connected with divinity, aestheticism and spirituality. Yellow halo is considered as an active ‘brow chakra’. It is considered to be ruling the solar plexus or third chakra. It is the source of core energy and exists between navel and ribs in an individual’s body. A clear yellow aura circled around head in reflection of spiritual advancement. Yellow aura is a powerful denotation of religiousness, spirituality and enlightenment. It creates a sensation of brightness and warmth. The yellow aura around Buddha is a reflection of this enlightenment, spiritual success and joyful detachment from everything. Jesus, being encircled by yellow halo, emblems this divinity.”

YELLOW ~ Pertains to the spleen and life energy. It is the color of awakening, optimism, easy-going nature, inspiration and intelligence.

SHADES OF YELLOW ~ Pale Yellow – psychic and spiritual awareness, optimism, hopefulness, positivity. Bright Yellow – fear of losing control, respect, power struggles and control personally and in business. Clear Metallic Gold – spirituality activated, inspirational awakening.

Fascinating, really …

So the question remains, “How would I live if I actually listened to and followed the wisdom of my heart, mind and body?”

It is time to be still and get to the ‘heart’ of it.

Personal Expansion

Published August 8, 2018 by tindertender

When younger, and smaller in stature, I felt much larger, larger than life! Now that I am physically larger I still feel spiritually larger than life, yet forget how my body has grown until I actually roll to the side and rest my hand on my belly.

Funny … I still feel the frame made by bones and therefore feel ‘smaller’ yet know the physical has grown. I realize too, that the spiritual aspect of this that I call me has grown also … I am in awe as I recall the differing phases this life has afforded me. I am in complete wonderment of this experience.

I have a friend who knew me when I was much thinner and used to say I should have more pride and join a gym, lose the weight I had gained. I let it be known I would learn to love me as I was. It is foolish to always be chasing some ‘form’ or dream … the ‘now’ IS where it is at … besides, for quite awhile now I have felt sort of separate from this flesh, even while living in it. Strange.

When I hear people judge my appearance … my weight, my current hair style, my clothes, or my tattoos … I tilt my head in wonder. Can’t they see there is so much more than that going on here?

Photo by Karl Magnuson

I think about the human experience and I wonder … aren’t people aware that we are all so similar? The BIG one is the fact that our minds are always churning thoughts, even when from looking at us it seems we are calm, cool and collected. Most of us dream and have difficulty remembering them, unless we journal right away upon waking. We have all suffered loss … of things, of love, of friends. We have all experienced lack of some sort … food, shelter, compassion and care. Many of us probably believe we deserve mistreatment it has been happening so long. Many of us have grown hard and decided we simply don’t care any more.

How do we return to love? How do we foster joy and feed the innocence within us? How do we release pain, sorrow, anger, jealousy, fear?

It begins by undoing the broken record which plays in our mind. It is in the creation of NEW super thought highways, it is in counter-intelligence.

Do you know you have the power to transform every single aspect of your mind? And in that transformation you essentially create new realities?

Perhaps you have been in a sour mood, yet put on a happy face, pretending. Before you know it, you may even actually BE in a good mood. This is the power of the mind. You can flip these switches on and off at the slightest intention!

Intention is everything, and it is yours, it is mine, it is ours.

This world is the collective dream, and together we can change what we see and what we experience, simply by choosing a different thought, action, and outcome.

And so when I think of my physical form I think me ‘skinny’. I wear comfortable clothes which do not bind and I honestly am not interested in what people think of my attire. I am too focused on the inside work, the inner expansion.

Awareness … it means so many things to different people. Let the vision expand, take it ALL in, and the ‘little’ things, such as the body, seem much smaller … whether some say it is or not.

Tired Body, Tired Mind

Published May 10, 2018 by tindertender

There are days when physical labor is pushed, maximized to the best of ones ability. There are also days when number crunching and project planning is a continuous cycle. Hours go by and the muscles begin to ache, the mind starts to as well. Tylenol can be ones best friend after this work.

Efforts made are increasing, it is as though we’ve entered the ‘spin cycle’ of life. There is a wringing out of the ‘suds’, a cleansing is happening. Soon there will be an end to the spin and it will be time to dry, fluffing and making soft the load we’ve been carrying.

Photo by Joshua Fuller

A blessing is in store. The effort, the stamina maintained as the sea of life is sailed, all experiences, will culminate in calm, it is going to settle. As the waters rage they are washing away the grime that has collected, and although it seems so much is destroyed, it is actually a purification. The sun is about to shine bright, bringing abundance in ways that have been missing for nearly everyone. As we begin to realize the intricate connection we have with the earth, the waters, the air and with each other, we will learn to ride the tide … not with fear and a clutching to anything we find for safety, but with balance and awe as the truth embraces us, and as we embrace the truth.

When things begin to sweep out from under, go to high ground … rise above it. Whether it be a tumultuous relationship of some kind, or some other experience … rise. This cleansing is going to happen, where you place yourself will determine how it affects you.

When too much is taken from a situation without anything given back an imbalance occurs. This is seen in many situations, it is in the products we choose, it is in what we put into the soil and water of the earth, it is what we allow in our lives..

As this shift happens, look around, practice really seeing others and how circumstances affect them, look deeply into your own world. Often, life is a story told and many of these tales are complete fiction.

Transparency, vulnerability … allowing the real you to shine will be the gift you came to share with the world. No one can be you better than you.

Keep Going

Resolution For Life

Published March 15, 2018 by tindertender

I stood at the brink of death, and I teetered … nearly destroyed by what I had done. I came back into the realm of goodness, however slow the journey was. Here I sit, focused on the health of my body, and I realize it is truly about mind, body, and soul/spirit. They all travel hand in hand and none go anywhere without the others, while here.

So focused on spirit have I been that I completely ignored the body. He says I am stronger than he thought I was, and I reply, “You haven’t seen anything yet.” This older woman is going to transform. I am happy for this new circumstance for it has allowed my mind to refocus and move forward in a more rounded manner. Steadily I add to my arsenal.


I will not be at the mercy of another claiming there is nothing that can be done, while slipping the tongue and saying quite the opposite. I caught his eye as this happened and saw that he hoped I hadn’t noticed. I did … and that’s all I needed to know.

I step more fully into my personal power. I take charge of my health in all realms. I will not live this life crawling and helpless, no … I resolve to finish strong.

Soul Transfer Through Organ Transplant

Published February 14, 2018 by tindertender

Shinto – It can be difficult to get consent for organ donation from a Shinto family, because the religion views injuring a dead body as a serious crime.

Amaterasu_cave_cropKamishin, or, archaically, jin (神) is defined in English as “god”, “spirit”, or “spiritual essence”, all these terms meaning “the energy generating a thing”. Since the Japanese language does not distinguish between singular and plural, kami refers to the divinity, or sacred essence, that manifests in multiple forms. Rocks, trees, rivers, animals, places, and even people can be said to possess the nature of kami.

The wide variety of usage of the word kami can be compared to the Sanskrit Deva and the Hebrew Elohim, which also refer to God, gods, angels, or spirits.

We all know by now that life is something we cling to. Even in our most depressive states, even in the most painful portions of life, we cling to it. This can be described as a “hope that trauma will pass” and life will soon be bearable again.

human-soulWhen organs fail, or when a loved one dies, we have a desire for life to continue. And so there is an agreement made between the one who wished to live, and the family members who wish for some part of their loved one to continue living. Often, these organs are rejected in the transplant process, and sometimes accepted, with life long drug treatment to maintain the acceptance.

With the racism in the world, the hatred of other ethnicities, I am quite surprised at the willingness of someone who is ill to accept anothers organ into their body. After all, they do not really know what they are getting. Crazy how we have trouble living with each other while all are in body, but in the face of death, people literally take another into their own body.

I suppose this is a case, or cases, where people aren’t really aware of the deeper issues, they only see that there is possibility of keeping someone elses heart beating.

Many people during life go to therapy seeking ‘soul retrieval’. Throughout life, we leave bits and pieces of our spirit self with others, and it can often leave one feeling depleted, somewhat lifeless. There is the process of cutting cords and reclaiming ones self, a detaching.

Once we accept anothers body part, or a piece of our own is surgically implanted into another body, this is a bond which cannot be undone. The two are now one. Making decisions about organ donation without fully understanding this is irresponsible.

I’m curious about the real motives for this research and surgeries …


When a loved one dies, a family may wish to donate their organs, not understanding that they have now made their loved ones incomplete … a portion of their soul has been taken from them. Perhaps it is desired because the family just can’t let go, or perhaps because they just aren’t informed.

In life, as much as we’d like to help others it is important to first help ourselves, for if we are not whole and healthy, we are no good to anyone. Does this rule of thumb also pertain to the afterlife? When should we say it is time to ‘let go’?


Pharmaceutical Effects On Brain & Body

Published January 25, 2018 by tindertender

Energies rise, energies become lower. It is interesting to observe the different effects of certain foods and drink on the energetic output of mind and body. Different medicines, too, have varying effects for the mind and body.

I listen to my mind and body as I take a pain medicine, I listen to my mind and body and I add Vitamin B-12 (for instance) to the days agenda. I listen to my mind and body when I alter any input at all, paying attention to the feel of flesh, the reaction of muscle, the performance of memory, the energetic impulses at my core.

3d rendered illustration of an active receptor

Antidepressants: decreased alertness; sexual problems; suicidal feelings (among many other side affects).
Pain medicines: interrupts the bodies ability to combat pain naturally; disrupts the chemical process of the brain and body.

Drugs, legal and illegal, alter the balance of the neurotransmitters. It is unfortunate that people are medicated so young since drugs severely impact the development of the body & minds ability to naturally come into balance, for life. This is not an imbalance that can be corrected by more medicine. Once neurotransmitters are damaged, and the chemicals the brain produced thrown out of whack, the only thing more medicine can do is mask the variation so a person can function ‘properly’.

If at all possible, it is wisest to choose a natural medicine rather than a chemical, lab created one. The use of pharmaceuticals literally alter the balance of the mind and body, used long enough, these imbalances will last a lifetime, requiring the use of same substance for remaining life to feel normal.

One should take care and investigate to their best ability medicine prescribed before allowing it in the body for any prolonged length of time.

As a younger person it never occurred to me that certain concoctions might be harmful, after all, they were sold over-the-counter. Honestly, I did not think I would live this long … there are probably many people who were of the same thought. So from experience, I can honestly recommend a more careful investigation into concoctions sold before trusting in their benefit for mind and body.

Just because it is allowed to be mass produced and marketed, does NOT mean that it is safe. Time, decades … have proven the science behind products needs a trial before true determination can be produced … unfortunately, it is the people who use OTC medicines for a number of years, who report the affects from this use, resulting in many items being removed from the shelves.

Know your ingredients and their effects … google is a great resource for most people with access. Take care what is put in the body, it will most likely need to last another several decades. The healthier it is going into midlife, the easier old age may be.

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