Balance

All posts tagged Balance

Free ~ No Longer Your ‘Assistant’

Published November 18, 2018 by tindertender

After all these years I must tell you that this is why I will not stand with you. I have experienced your presence while you speak about me as though I cannot hear you, you behave as though I am not worthy of a one on one conversation. This is not acceptable, I am not at your disposal, nor am I willing to give you any further energies.

I have tried many times in the past to convince myself that we are alike, that you must have good reason to behave the way you do, that if I were in your position I might even do the same. Regardless, I am not in your position, and I do not behave the way you do, even though I have good reason to.

In this manner, we are nothing alike. In fact, you could say that we are polar opposites. While you are very good at mimicking goodness, sooner or later your inner self shows. It brings down the House you try to build, time and time again. The foundation is not true.

I am sorry for you, but I do not pity you, for you have consciously, fully aware, chosen to do the things you do, putting forth influence onto the vulnerable and unaware. Many lives have been affected … or ended, due to your selfish behaviors and trespasses.

I would like to say I understand, and that I forgive you. I will also say that I will do whatever I can to ensure that the privileges you’ve been taking advantage of will never be fully loosed, or enjoyed by you.

This is a time for those who have been running with you to open their eyes and get serious about what they choose. In the ‘end game’ nothing could be more serious.

How many life times does one soul need to determine where their heart resides? How long does it take to reclaim the spirit and mind from those who have manipulated actions and circumstances to coincide with greed or need for power?

When will mankind discover that no one has more authority over their life than they themselves do? People are always looking for a ‘leader’ or a ‘teacher’, not realizing that they can, and do lead, and teach … they lead their own lives, getting what they give, or accepting what they allow. They are in process of teaching others what to, or not to, be and do, shared through example. They are in process of being ‘taught’ by those they have perhaps not been willing, or able, to acknowledge.

All of this, all of it is known to the gentle heart who wishes to participate in the healing of the world, of life in general.

You know this. You take advantage of the gentle souls who long for peace. You lead them to believe that if they trust you, if they agree to help you, that peace will be. But peace is not coming forth from the chaos you bring. It has only become more chaotic, more solidly enriched with pain, supported by fear, by paranoia.

I hear you laugh as you see the affect you bring to people. I sense your pride in your ability to manipulate emotion, allowing, or ending life … as you will.

As a collective, this I know to be true. You have dared to attack the unwitting. The selfishness of your goal leaves no room for compassion. You say, “I like this one” as though they were an object … not someone who feels, thinks, loves, and acts. You behave as though you do not see the truest power that resides in them. Maybe you do, and simply pride yourself on the methods used to extinguish that bright light within them.

I cannot silently stand by and watch you ruin lives.

Those of us who are on to you know full well that the ones you attack are not only fighting you, but fighting the others who you have controlled. Double whammy, the people who join you are not even aware they are under your influence, actually doing your bidding … as you laugh, all kicked back enjoying yourself. I am amazed how well you keep secret the influences you lay upon minds, they so often are not even aware that these ‘thoughts’ and ‘desires’ are not even their own.

There is a time coming soon when we will find out how this goes. So many believe they already know. Unfortunately, all they really know is what they’ve been told to believe, what they’ve been taught as factual. The actual ‘experience’ of knowing eludes many.

On this level, I am torn. I would never wish my experience on anyone, for I know many who did not make it through. Yet at the same time, if something doesn’t shake the ol’ tree, no one will ever see clearly, or at least come to the knowledge that what they thought they knew was a lie, all along.

May the eyes and minds of humanity be quivered ever so slightly to break up the rigidity of ‘lessons learned’ which have developed into habits. May they be ‘gently nudged’ into motion and discovery of their inner, innate power for goodness. May it be done quickly, thoroughly, and with minimal ‘safeties’ on. May the hearts of mankind be unshackled and set free, without erupting into deep sadness, depression, remorse or anxiety. May they see through the fog that has been placed upon them, may their blood remain warm, and their strength and courage steadfast, their hearts pure.

… and may all that is good bless me with the same.

Break The Program

Published November 15, 2018 by tindertender

I stood upon the forest floor and as my gaze drew to the ground I saw a log, hollow. Upon looking, I saw a creature within this hollowed out log, watching me.

I wonder about nature as it deteriorates, becoming one with the earth once more, only now rather than planting roots, it dissolves into the soil feeding the little critters dwelling there.

Human and animal bodies, all of them, eventually dissolve back into the earth. The soil is enmeshed with generations of life.

“Steel caskets first appeared in the late 1840s“. https://www.assemblymag.com/articles/87043-the-history-of-caskets

Imagine all of the life that was wrapped in cloth, buried in a pine box, or just left to slowly decompose. Think of all the animals killed on highways, or by other animals, or by humans during trophy hunts, among other things. ALL of that life is contributed to the planet, to the earths soil, which supplies us with food, water, and materials to build.

How often do we go about our daily life neglecting to consider the earth we walk upon, or the components of it. Why is it so difficult to know, to admit, and to embrace the unity we share with those who came before us, those who are here with us now (in flesh, and in spirit) and those who will come at a later time?

It seems to me that the public, world-wide, have been corralled into this situation of “me” and “mine” and “forget everyone and everything else”. What little we are allowed to retain after taxation is just enough (for the average person) to get by until the next pay day. Often the taxes paid go to care for others who are able to work, but don’t.

I am aware there are those who physically and mentally cannot do many jobs that are available, and they require assistance. I am also aware of those who just want to skate through life at the expense of others (taking pride in their clever ability to work the system).

When so little remains after a hard work week it is difficult to release what has been saved … to give. But if we do not find a way to open our hearts, to share with each other … if we choose to remain closed off and in the practice of hoarding, we will also be closed off to abundance.

It is hard when there are so many scam artists and thieves. When those who forcibly ‘take’ from others choose to expend their energy in creating fear and pain, they no longer gift the world good … perhaps ‘good’ has left them.

When I mention being open to giving, I do not mean to roll over while thugs demand the bounty.

There will come a time very soon when robber will only have the robber to take from, and the murderer or rapist will only have the same to reflect their actions, and then they will nullify each other’s existence … all of them.

Where will those who choose peace, caring, and love be when all this goes down? Well, I cannot say for certain. I get the distinct feeling they will be just on the outside, looking in. I can only hope this is where I will be, yet at the same time I hope I will not have to watch it end.

In my opinion, people who are uncertain that life continues after the body dies are more inclined to behave in a manner that is destructive. If they knew that life never ends, it only changes, constantly, perhaps actions would be different. We see these changes while in physical form as we age from infant, to toddler, to young child, to teenager, to adult, and then elder. Our appearance changes drastically, as well as our inner person, just as drastically.

When this body quits us, life continues just as before, yet in a different form. I imagine how that might look, and once again my creative visualization stalls.

What does one star appear to be, when viewed by another star?

When a woman looks upon another woman, what does she see? Clothing, vehicle, partner … does she see tenderness, or fear, or anger? Is she able to see depth, or is everything surface level? Cold, or warm? Does she begin to compare herself to this vision she sees? Is she capable of looking deeper, into the nearly imperceptible similarities she has in common with those she observes? Will she be able to stand tall in her uniqueness, while embracing the likeness she shares with others?

Too much time is spent thinking and wishing to be someone or something we are not. Rather, think of something you would like to try, painting, writing, dancing … and then try it. If you don’t really like it, try something else. And so on.

When I first started taking myself out to dinner I was self conscious. It felt as though people were staring, wondering why I was alone. It took a while to get past that, to get used to just enjoying life without needing to entertain another, or to be entertained.

Now I do many things I did not do before. Some of these things I am good at, others, I work at. Whatever we do, we should do it while lifting each other, encouraging each other and living the advise we share.

I have a friend who told me I needed to take ‘pride’ in my appearance. What he meant was, “You’re fat, join a gym.” I finally got tired of it and told him he was wrong. What I needed to do was learn to ‘love me’ just the way I am.

There are those in the world who will always point out their perception of what is wrong, or what is right. Many people will work diligently to ‘mold’ those around them, to manipulate circumstances to achieve a certain action – response – action – response. They’ll work very hard to get the results they desire. We see this everywhere in this world. Governments, corporations, different religions, on into the smaller, more personal relationships.

FYI ~ this is a human trait … we all do it, even while many will deny it.

The only cure is to simply stop playing the game. As difficult as the program is to break … treat yourself to participation in the bigger picture.

Social Terrorism

Published November 4, 2018 by tindertender

It’s tearing our world apart, and it does not require physical violence.

For centuries people have terrorized each other. Man against woman, adult against child, child against child, adult against adult, government against government, government against its very own people. Humans beat each other, kill each other, mentally abuse each other, and even abuse themselves. They butcher and consume animals, they mistreat the animals without care for the harm they do.

This terrorism is bred into society. Governments speak of terrorism daily. It trickles into the minds of all who listen. The pain created by individuals who ‘play the terrorist game’ is absorbed into minds of those who are inflicted upon.

This is learned behavior. Just as children learn from watching their parents, all people learn from watching their ‘leaders’ to gauge what is acceptable, what is deemed appropriate. Governments say it is all about ‘bad people’, but this is what they themselves finance and foster and do in covert ways every day.

It has been talked of, and performed for so long that it has become a normal part of existence. Crimes against humanity have been neglected and approved by so many in the world that it continues, and its intensity grows.

Bullying is more than that … it is social terrorism, and often it is overlooked and ignored.

Domestic abuse is more than that … it is social terrorism, and often, it too, is overlooked and ignored, until someone dies.

Peer pressure is more than that … it is social terrorism, requiring many times that people conform to the ‘accepted rule’ of the few, or ‘bullying ensues’.

This is the behavior of many countries representatives. It is no wonder the average person falls into it as well.

My hope is that people the world over will stop ‘softening’ what is actually going on here and call it for what it is. Stop making bad behavior acceptable, hold people accountable, hold yourself accountable.

It is never okay to stomp on another’s head. You don’t agree with them or their life? Move on, find people who you DO agree with and stop making others miserable. This only shows how miserable of a life you yourself must have.

Being responsible means taking a good hard look at your thoughts and actions. Evaluate the imprint you are putting into this world. Look at it and see whether it is adding to healing in the world, or exacerbating the pain. Adjust accordingly.

If you are of the mind that you would like to facilitate pain and destruction, you will get what you give. If you intentionally, consciously work for healing in this world, you will get what you give …. in this life, or the next. By ‘next’ I mean in Spirit, or your next go ’round in physical form.

The cycle must be broken.
Social Terrorism is NOT okay.

Next Steps

Published October 30, 2018 by tindertender

Now that your eyes are wide open and your mind expanding, what is your next step? The reality which was spoon fed in youth turned out to be a ‘story’ most people were also spoon fed. You see now, don’t you? It was all a strategic illusion, orchestrated to keep the masses under control.

As you look around you can see the facade crumbling. You can see the increase in chaos as those becoming aware of lack in their life attempt to take from those who have a little more. Rather than people working together to benefit the whole, they grip tightly that which they’ve managed to scrape together and refuse to let go. Eventually, what is gripped tightly will be gone and nothing will be left, not even a friend who will be interested in helping in time of need.

In this sense, what is given is received. Assistance, a prayer, sacred energetic transfer, snarls and slander, love and hate, sharing, caring, acceptance and dismissal. All of it will be returned to the giver.

It is important to share if possible. It is beneficial to give to others, and to also allow others to give to you. Receiving can be a difficult thing to do. I used to refuse offers of gifts, until I realized that what I was doing was ‘stealing’ from them the opportunity to give. I do not like theft, so I practice this give and take, all while focusing on care, and share exchange.

We are trained to be stoic, to bulldog our way through life and “keep a stiff upper lip” and to “grow a spine” among other phrases. We are taught to move through life as solo, or with minimal assistance. Sharing seems foreign to those who have been instructed early to “stand on their own”.

Some countries have entire family units under the same roof. They share commodities as well as chores. Obviously this is necessary, for many in this world have very little, and the only way to survive is to ‘stick together’.

I foresee a time when cities, and towns, are broken down even further into ‘villages’. Smaller extended groups who all pitch in to benefit the whole, and anyone who desires “power” over others will not be tolerated.

This life is not all there is. There were other lives lived before this one, and there will be others lived after. What kind of world do you wish to be born again in to? We are in the process of creating it now.

The sea of life may get a little rough before it calms. In this time there will be those who ‘take’, those who ‘give’, and those who hold base while it all works itself out.

If you haven’t had the experience yet, I highly recommend a past life regression hypnosis. This will open your mind, allowing you to see the truth of cycles, and the depth of our intertwined experiences.

Flexing In Time

Published October 10, 2018 by tindertender

The questions we ask of ourselves, and then ponder, are keys to opening up and expanding current awareness. For instance:

How can I be more flexible?

Flexibility could mean the bodily joints, it could mean having patience when plans go afoul, and it could mean being open to people, places and things that have unknown potential for life.

Fear often inhibits the freedom to be flexible. Suspicion of others intentions often causes rigidity of spine and energies, and a stillness comes over one, or should I say, a stubbornness.

Flexible spending, flexible time schedules, flexible mind, willing to take on, or at least consider, new knowledge or possibilities.

Thinking about things deeply can bring about criticism, especially if far-out ideas and theories are shared. Not too many people are ready to consider the fantastic as possible reality.

Star Trek, Space War, Weather modification and manipulation, Mind control, The presence of other life forms right before our eyes … these things are not fantasy, although there are plenty of folks who insist they are.

So as not to be part of the rigid, unbendable type, I practice ‘flexing’ the mind, considering all possibilities and investigating all scenarios that are called ‘conspiracy theory’.

The more you are willing to know …

Life is about flow. The years flow into each other, the seasons too. The human body flows through the years, so slowly the shift in appearance is barely perceptible until several years pass. The mind flows from one opinion to the next, and when what is thought to be real and true are blown out of the water, the mind once again latches onto something ‘comfortable’, making this new situation ‘real’.

Sitting in my chair last night I envisioned myself as a child, fresh and innocent, in love with life and with love. As the years went by things happened, people happened, and hurts felt were shared and spread. And time continued to flow, until an awareness began to creep in, and then pour in.

I saw these aspects of my life hold hands and form a circle. They smiled at each other and others, and they began to dance a little, moving in a counter-clockwise circle.

I Am Many …

We all are. How can we be more flexible? By first understanding that every single memory we have of every single day we’ve been alive, is an aspect of ourselves which still lives, and is very real.

Some folks talk of the inner child, and it is true, they are there too. Along with the 10 year old, and the 16year old, and the 21 year old, and the 30 year old and so forth. Thinking of these times in life I am certain you too have solid memories making it easy to visualize yourself at certain events or situations.

Let every single memory you hold be embraced and loved by the adult you currently are. Hold the injured one, laugh with the smiling one, and work with the adventurous one. They are all here, living still … inside each and every one of us.

To deny these important parts of ourself is to deny the strengths and courage each aspect has to offer.

Be flexible, offer them homage inside your mind, your heart, and your life. Your capacities will amplify, and love too … self love, spilling into love for all life in this world, other planets, and in all spaces between.

Where Do We Go From Here?

Published September 26, 2018 by tindertender

Shadow: Make the sacrifice
Soul: Embrace spirit
Let two be one: Embrace the dark

You will not achieve the outcome you desire if you are unwilling to act upon your intentions. It is not as simple as wanting something to happen, or believing that it will happen. You have to make it happen, and to make it happen requires that you be willing and ready to do whatever is necessary no matter the sacrifice. For everything you desire, you must give of yourself in return.

You are a spiritual being, living a physical life. Embrace spirit in your journey and reaffirm your connection with the Divine. Fly to the heavens, but remember to look down and see that the Divine exists in the magical, natural world beneath you. Spirit dwells within all ~ in everything you see and know, and everything that you do not see and which is unknown. Both the creative and the destructive, the beautiful and the ugly, are born of the Divine.

You have been taught that all is either  good or evil, negative or positive; good gives rise to good, and bad gives rise to bad. It is wrong to have feelings of anger, dislike or fear as these emotions are born of our shadow self. This is not Truth. Everything happens for a reason. Love can give rise to destruction, and hate can inspire acts of genuine love. The lessons offered by our shadow often teach us the most. Know your shadow self. Love it. Without the darkness, the stars cannot be seen.

Still Relevant

Published September 24, 2018 by tindertender

I’ve been asking my loneliness, anger, grief, and physical pain what they are trying to convey.

I ask them, “What do you want me to know?”

As I look within, the pain begins to lessen.

I drop deep into my being like a ride on a long water slide, and allow myself to be taken there, with no control. Finally, I plunge into the deep waters of me.

Ancient information is revealed and the answers of what to do next are there, too. The poison and the medicine grow together, simultaneously.

When I was in Mexico, a Mayan medicine man showed me and two others around the jungle. He told us about the plants and what they are good for.

The most poisonous tree grows right next to its antidote. This fascinated me to no end! The Chechem and Chaka trees are connected at the roots. If a human is exposed to the poisonous sap of one, the bark of the other is the antidote.

Like the Chechem and Chaka trees, when I experience poison in my life, the antidote is growing right next to it, roots entwined.

When I acknowledge it (whatever is asking to be seen), I am simultaneously allowing for healing. The antidote is entwined in the pain.

Once that poison is addressed and healed, I notice there is room for my path and purpose to expand into the place that the poison held for so long. From there, it feels like ease.

Now there is a void where the poison was removed. What now? Everything in my being wants to put something there. It’s the natural way of the Universe after all, it abhors a void.

A black hole will do everything in its power to fill itself. Its vacuum becomes stronger and stronger until something fills it. It sucks entire galaxies into its field in a sort of cosmic hungry ghost way, never to be satiated.

My experience tells me to pause. Be discerning. Wait. Ask my Higher Self what it wants.

If I resist the strong pull to put a person, an activity, a substance there, in that newly vacant place, something beautiful happens.

I feel…Empowered. No longer a victim of my world.

I feel whole instead of my gaping hole of a wound. I feel stronger, more confident, less interested in what others think of me. I discover who I really am and what my purpose is on this Earth.

For me, It is so much easier to blame others or make others responsible for my pain and happiness. What I am finding is that there are creative MyStories bursting forth and they are ready to be expressed. My creativity is blooming again.

Lemme tell you, it’s a mutherfucker getting there, but if you can trust the people who have gone before you and know they survived…you will, too. It’s sssooooo fucking worth it.

I love you. A bunch.

Desiree LoveAll Rudder

https://www.happyspirithealingarts.com/

%d bloggers like this: