Choice

All posts tagged Choice

The World is Ending!

Published December 20, 2025 by tindertender

My husband didn’t pack his bags for a mistress. He packed them for a “movement.” He said he was suffocating in our silence, but the truth is, he was drowning in the noise.

We were the picture of the American Dream, circa 2024. Or maybe the caricature of it.

We had the house in the suburbs with the kitchen island that was too big to clean and a mortgage rate that kept us awake at night. We had two cars in the driveway and subscriptions to five different streaming services we never watched. But mostly, we had the glow.

That pale, blue, flickering glow.

For the last three years, Mark hadn’t really been in the room with me. He was in the comment sections. He was in the forums. He was fighting invisible wars against strangers who lived three thousand miles away. Dinner conversations used to be about our day, about the kids who were off at college, about the leak in the gutter.

Then, the conversations stopped. They were replaced by lectures.

He would look up from his phone, eyes bloodshot, and ask if I’d seen what “They” were doing to the dollar. What “They” were putting in the water. What “They” were teaching in schools. He never specified who “They” were, and frankly, depending on which channel he was watching, “They” changed every week.

I was exhausted. Not physically, but deeply, spiritually tired. I was tired of walking on eggshells in my own living room, afraid that mentioning the price of eggs would trigger a twenty-minute rant about supply chains and geopolitical conspiracies.

So when he stood by the door with his duffel bag, looking like a man preparing for a tactical mission rather than a mid-life crisis, I didn’t cry.

“I can’t do this anymore, Sarah,” he said. He sounded breathless, like he was running from something. “I need to find a place that’s real. I need to be around people who are awake. You… you’re just sleepwalking. You’re content to let the world burn as long as you have your garden and your coffee.”

He called it a “sabbatical for clarity.” He was going to drive out West, maybe join an off-grid community he’d found online. A place where “freedom still mattered.”

“And what about us?” I asked, leaning against the granite counter I still hadn’t paid off.

“I need to save myself first,” he said. “You should try waking up, Sarah. The world is ending.”

Then the door clicked shut. The engine revved. And he was gone.

I stood there in the hallway. I waited for the panic. I waited for the crushing weight of abandonment that every magazine article told me I should feel.

Instead, I heard it.

The silence.

The TV wasn’t blaring breaking news about a crisis I couldn’t solve. The phone wasn’t pinging with notifications about impending doom. The air in the house didn’t feel charged with static electricity anymore.

I walked to the living room and picked up the remote. I pressed the power button. The screen went black.

“Okay,” I whispered to the empty room. “The world is ending. So I might as well make dinner.”

The first week was strange. The silence was loud. But by the second week, I realized something terrifying: We had been working ourselves to death to maintain a lifestyle that was making us miserable.

I looked at the big house. It was a museum of things we bought to impress people we didn’t like. It was a storage unit for anxiety.

So, I did the unthinkable. I put the house on the market.

My friends were horrified. “But Sarah, the equity! But Sarah, where will you go? You need to downsize to a condo downtown, stay connected!”

I didn’t want a condo. I didn’t want “connected.” I wanted “grounded.”

I bought a small, drafty cottage two towns over. It needed a new roof and the floors creaked, but it had a front porch and a plot of land that got good morning sun. It reminded me of my grandmother’s house in the 80s—before everyone carried a computer in their pocket, back when neighbors actually knew each other’s names not because of a neighborhood watch app, but because they borrowed sugar.

I stopped watching the news. I figured if the world actually ended, someone would come knock on my door and tell me.

I started living a life that looked, from the outside, incredibly small.

I cancelled the subscriptions. I got a library card. I bought a second-hand radio that only picked up the local jazz station and the Sunday baseball games.

I started baking. Not the sourdough starter trend for Instagram, but real baking. I dug out my grandmother’s handwritten recipe cards, stained with butter and vanilla from forty years ago. There was something spiritual about kneading dough. It was physical. It was real. You couldn’t argue with flour; you just had to work with it.

One afternoon, my internet went down. A year ago, this would have caused a meltdown in our household. Mark would have been screaming at the service provider. I would have been panicked about missing emails.

Now? I just made a cup of tea and sat on the porch.

A young woman walked by, pushing a stroller. She looked frazzled, a Bluetooth earpiece blinking in her ear, talking rapidly about quarterly projections. She stopped when she saw me.

“Everything okay?” she asked, pointing at my house. “Power’s out on the whole block. No Wi-Fi.”

“I know,” I smiled. “Would you like a slice of apple pie? It’s still warm.”

She looked at me like I was an alien. Then, she looked at the pie. She touched her earpiece and tapped it off.

“I… I would love that,” she sighed, her shoulders dropping three inches.

We sat on the porch steps. We didn’t talk about the election. We didn’t talk about the stock market. We talked about how hard it is to keep hydrangeas blue. We talked about how fast her baby was growing. We talked about the smell of rain before a storm.

For an hour, we were just humans. Not voters, not consumers, not demographics. Just humans eating pie.

“It feels like time moves slower here,” she said, wiping a crumb from her lip. “I feel like I remember this feeling, but I don’t know from where.”

“It’s not memory,” I told her. “It’s presence. We used to live like this. We just forgot we could.”

Three months later, Mark called.

The connection was crackly. He was somewhere in the desert. The “community” hadn’t worked out—too many arguments about leadership, too few people willing to clean the latrines. Now he was in a motel, looking for the next big thing.

“It’s chaos out here, Sarah,” he sounded smaller, older. “The country is falling apart. You have no idea. I’m just trying to find a signal so I can upload my vlog.”

“I’m sorry, Mark,” I said, and I meant it.

“What are you doing?” he asked. “Are you still… asleep?”

I looked around my kitchen. There was a bowl of fresh tomatoes on the counter. A stack of paperback books on the table. The radio was playing a soft saxophone melody. The window was open, and I could hear the neighbor’s kids playing tag, their laughter cutting through the summer air.

I wasn’t asleep. I was the most awake I had ever been.

“No, Mark,” I said gently. “I’m just living.”

“But how can you live when everything is at stake?” he demanded, his voice rising with that old, familiar panic. “Don’t you care about the future?”

“I am building the future,” I said. “I’m building it right here. By keeping my peace. By feeding my neighbors. By refusing to let the noise inside my house.”

He didn’t understand. He hung up to go chase another phantom, another outrage, another digital war.

I put the phone down. I didn’t check social media to see if he posted about our call. I didn’t check my bank account to soothe my anxiety.

I went back to the dough on the counter. I pressed my hands into it, feeling the resistance, the elasticity, the promise of something rising.

We spend so much time screaming for a better world that we forget to build a decent life. We think freedom is having a million choices, a million channels, a million voices in our pockets.

But I learned the truth in a creaky house with a broken internet connection.

Freedom isn’t about escaping the system. It’s about unplugging from the fear.

It’s realizing that the “Good Old Days” aren’t a time you can travel back to. They are a state of mind you have to fight for, right here, right now.

And one thing is certain: Happiness doesn’t come from having the loudest voice in the room. It comes when you realize you no longer need to shout to be heard. You just need to be whole.

Her Energy Shapes the Home: A Woman’s Aura as Medicine

Published December 10, 2025 by tindertender

A woman’s aura is one of the most powerful forces within a home. It carries her emotions, her thoughts, her intentions, and her spiritual vibration. Long before she speaks, her energy is already communicating. A home can feel warm, tense, alive, stagnant, peaceful, or chaotic—and often, the root of that vibration is the state of the woman’s inner world.

This is why the feminine path calls for deep emotional hygiene. Just as she cleans her physical home, she must cleanse her internal one. Breathwork releases anxiety from her chest. Journaling clears mental clutter. Movement releases stagnant energy from her hips and womb. Herbal baths dissolve emotional residue from her aura. When a woman purifies her energy, her entire home begins to shift.

Children feel it first—they relax, open up, feel safer. Partners feel it next—the tension dissolves, communication softens, connection deepens. Even visitors feel it—they enter the space and say, “It feels peaceful in here.” This is the power of a woman in alignment.

A woman does not need to raise her voice or demand control to influence her household. Her power is subtle, but it is magnetic. Her calm steadies the home. Her joy lifts it. Her sorrow dims it. Her healing transforms it. This is not pressure—it is divine authority.

When a woman honors her energy, she teaches everyone around her to honor theirs. She models emotional intelligence, spiritual awareness, and intentional living. She becomes the emotional thermostat, not the emotional sponge. She leads with softness, not with exhaustion. She heals with presence, not perfection.

A woman in her feminine power is the medicine of her household. Her aura becomes the blessing that fills every room, every conversation, and every heart that shares the space with her.

Compassion Doesn’t Come with a Price Tag

Published December 6, 2025 by tindertender

I almost let a teenage girl freeze to death on Thanksgiving Eve because of a stupid sign I hung on my own wall.

NO LOITERING. NO SLEEPING. NO PETS.

I run a 24-hour laundromat in Chicago—where winter doesn’t show mercy, and if you show too much, your business turns into a free hostel. I’ve learned the hard way that if I let one person nap on a folding table, by sunrise I’ve got a whole encampment of them.

Rules keep the doors open.

Or at least, that’s what I told myself.

Last Wednesday, the wind was doing that sideways snow thing, the kind that slaps your face even when you’re indoors. I was in the back, grumbling about mopping floors instead of being home with my wife’s turkey, when the door chimed.

A girl walked in. Seventeen, maybe. Thin as a coat hanger. Hoodie soaked. Sneakers squishing with each step.

And beside her?

A monster.

At least, that’s what I thought.

A massive gray Pitbull mix. Scarred. Shivering. Built like he could bench-press a sedan. The type of dog people avoid by crossing an entire street.

“No dogs,” I barked, tapping the No Pets sign like a judge swinging a gavel.

She winced. “Please… just ten minutes. The shelter’s full. I just need my toes to stop hurting.”

The dog—Tank—pressed his whole body against her leg, as if trying to fuse himself into her for warmth.

“Fifteen minutes,” I muttered. “He makes one sound, I’m calling the cops.”

They retreated to the coldest corner. I retreated to the security monitor, looking for any excuse to kick them out.

Then I watched her pull out a handful of coins—pennies, nickels, a dime that looked like it had survived the Great Chicago Fire. She counted them over and over until she could afford a pack of those terrible orange peanut-butter crackers.

She sat on the floor, opened the pack…

and didn’t take a single bite.

She broke a cracker and held it out to Tank.

“Eat, buddy.”

Tank sniffed it. His ribs showed. He needed food desperately. But he pushed it back toward her.

She insisted. He refused.

And in that moment, on a grainy black-and-white screen, I watched a starving dog protect the only person he loved by refusing to let her go hungry.

My throat tightened.

Then things got worse.

Mike—the drunk regular who occasionally slept behind a dryer—stumbled over, reeking of whiskey.

“Got a dollar, sweetheart?” he slurred.

Tank stood up—not snarling, not attacking. Just planting himself like a shield between the girl and the man.

A living, breathing wall.

Mike reached toward her shoulder.

Tank growled—a low, seismic warning that said, Touch her and you’ll wish you hadn’t.

The girl wrapped her arms around Tank’s neck and begged, “Don’t hurt him, please! He’s just scared!”

That was the moment my rules stopped mattering.

I grabbed the baseball bat, marched over, and pointed it—not at the dog, but at Mike.

“Out. Now.”

He left so fast he forgot his bottle.

I locked the door. Flipped the sign to CLOSED. The girl looked up at me with terrified eyes, bracing for the moment I’d kick her out into the blizzard.

But I just walked to the back, grabbed the Tupperware my wife had packed—thick turkey slices, mashed potatoes, gravy—and set it in front of them.

“The dryer in this corner overheats,” I lied. “I need someone to sit here tonight and make sure it doesn’t catch fire. Job comes with dinner.”

She stared at the food like it was a dream she was afraid to touch.

“Sir?” she whispered, voice cracking.

“Eat,” I said. “Both of you.”

Tank waited—actually waited—until she swallowed her first bite before he took one for himself.

The toughest thing in that room wasn’t my bat. It was a half-frozen Pitbull who’d rather starve than let his girl go hungry.

That night changed me.

We spend so much time judging people by what they wear, where they sleep, or what they have in their pockets. We judge dogs by the size of their jaws and the scars on their skin.

But loyalty doesn’t live in appearances.

Compassion doesn’t come with a price tag.

And sometimes the best guardian angel you’ll ever meet arrives covered in frost, with a teenager on one side and a trembling Pitbull on the other.

If I’d followed my own rules, I would’ve shut the door on both.

Instead, I learned this:

Family isn’t always blood.

Protection doesn’t always look gentle.

And the biggest hearts often beat inside the bodies we’ve been trained to fear.

So next time someone walks into your life looking rough, tired, or “dangerous”…

maybe look twice.

You might be staring at the purest form of love you’ll ever see.

A poem by Charlie Chaplin

Published December 1, 2025 by tindertender

A poem by Charlie Chaplin written on his 70th birthday on April 16, 1959:

When I started loving myself
I understood that I’m always and at any given opportunity
in the right place at the right time.
And I understood that all that happens is right –
from then on I could be calm.
Today I know: It’s called TRUST.

When I started to love myself I understood how much it can offend somebody
When I tried to force my desires on this person,
even though I knew the time is not right and the person was not ready for it,
and even though this person was me.
Today I know: It’s called LETTING GO

When I started loving myself
I could recognize that emotional pain and grief
are just warnings for me to not live against my own truth.
Today I know: It’s called AUTHENTICALLY BEING.

When I started loving myself
I stopped longing for another life
and could see that everything around me was a request to grow.
Today I know: It’s called MATURITY.

When I started loving myself
I stopped depriving myself of my free time
and stopped sketching further magnificent projects for the future.
Today I only do what’s fun and joy for me,
what I love and what makes my heart laugh,
in my own way and in my tempo.
Today I know: it’s called HONESTY.

When I started loving myself
I escaped from all what wasn’t healthy for me,
from dishes, people, things, situations
and from everything pulling me down and away from myself.
In the beginning I called it “healthy egoism”,
but today I know: it’s called SELF-LOVE.

When I started loving myself
I stopped wanting to be always right
thus I’ve been less wrong.
Today I’ve recognized: it’s called HUMBLENESS.

When I started loving myself
I refused to live further in the past
and worry about my future.
Now I live only at this moment where EVERYTHING takes place,
like this I live every day and I call it CONSCIOUSNESS.

When I started loving myself
I recognized, that my thinking
can make me miserable and sick.
When I requested for my heart forces,
my mind got an important partner.
Today I call this connection HEART WISDOM.

We do not need to fear further discussions,
conflicts and problems with ourselves and others
since even stars sometimes bang on each other
and create new worlds.
Today I know: THIS IS LIFE!

🌳💚💗 Sisterhood 🌳💚💗

Published November 30, 2025 by tindertender

If I show you my heart
Will you know what that means?
If I tell you the truth
Will you still hold my gaze?
If I own all the parts that society shuns
Will you shun me too?
Would you choose to let me walk this path
Without you?

Or will you laugh that wild laugh,
Roar from your knees,
Dance like the wind
Strip like the trees
Will you throw out the lies
And the fear of ‘too much’
And redefine ‘sisters’
Beside me…

~ by Clare Dubois, Founder of http://www.treesisters.org

Image credit and deep thank you to our Artist Partner Tamara Phillips ART

You call it FREEDOM

Published November 26, 2025 by tindertender

You call it FREEDOM, but biology calls it FAILURE (a man can’t truly love two women and here’s why):

This isn’t about morality. It’s about biology:

The Y chromosome doesn’t lie. The vasopressin gene responsible for pair bonding – is embedded in a man’s DNA. The higher the level of this hormone, the stronger the instinct to attach, protect, and invest in one woman. It’s not a choice. It’s hardwired.

True alphas are monogamous.

Swans. Wolves. Eagles. All dominant males in nature choose one mate and fiercely protect their bond. Why? Because evolution eliminates the weak. Males who spread themselves thin produce weaker offspring and vanish.

Polygamy is a myth invented by the weak.

It’s not “male nature.” It’s a cowardly way to escape intimacy, depth, and emotional growth.

Real bonding rewires the male brain – activating the prefrontal cortex, the center for strategy, long-term planning, and protection.

Monogamous men are more powerful. They have higher testosterone, more dopamine in stable relationships, and greater emotional resilience. The ones jumping from woman to woman? Burnt out hormones, fried nervous systems, and a void they can’t fill.

Real strength lies in choosing one. The best one. The most worthy. And building depth over time. Collecting mediocrity is not “alpha” – it’s the move of an emotionally stunted boy afraid to grow up.

A If you can’t build with one woman – the problem isn’t human nature. The problem is you.

Monogamy isn’t a limitation. It’s a test of strength. And if you’re truly a man – you already know that.

Love 💕 999 🕊️

Published November 23, 2025 by tindertender

When a human being chooses to live in ignorance, arrogance, self-absorption, self-centeredness, selfishness, and self-indulgence… they become emotionally addicted to the identity of pride. They become addicted to the illusion of control, the illusion of superiority, and the illusion of certainty. They attach their worth to stubbornness and rebellion, refusing to soften, refusing to listen, refusing to feel the truth that lives within the heart of their soul.

When someone chooses arrogance over humility, when they choose self-absorption over self-awareness, they disconnect from the true condition of their soul. They choose unloving beliefs. They choose unloving emotions. They choose unloving behaviors. And because of that, they have zero desire to deconstruct their facade.
Zero desire to deconstruct their traumas.
Zero desire to deconstruct their emotional wounds.
Zero desire to deconstruct their sins, their shadows, their false identities that were inherited through their family DNA.

Instead, they worship their addictions.
They praise their attachments.
They treasure their codependencies as if they are sacred.
They idolize the very prison that keeps them suffering.

And so they become emotionally addicted to their rage, their anger, their hatred, their bitterness.
They become addicted to their false assumptions.
They become addicted to their false narratives.
They become addicted to their false stories and false judgments.
They become addicted to the identity of their own fears and terrors.

And then, because they refuse to feel, refuse to take accountability, refuse to take ownership, they project all of it onto their reality, onto the people around them, onto the world, onto the ones who actually love them.

And this is why humility is the gateway to God.
This is why emotional transparency is the portal to liberation.
This is why the willingness to feel is the key to freedom.

Because until a soul becomes willing to dismantle everything false within them,
they will remain trapped in the illusion that is destroying them.

And for those who choose truth,
who choose humility,
who choose emotional honesty,
who choose divine accountability,
they resurrect.
They rise.
They rebirth.
They reclaim their original soul identity in God.

We God This.
Sacred Sovereignty. Divine Liberation.
Rise in Truth. Rise in Love. Rise in Humility.

We GOD this ,

Jason Justice Love 💕 999 🕊️

For Warmth

Published November 18, 2025 by tindertender

I hold my face in my two hands.
No. I am not crying.
I hold my face in my two hands
to keep my loneliness warm ~
two hands protecting,
two hands nourishing,
two hands preventing
my soul from leaving me
in anger.

~ Thich Nhat Hanh
Be Free Where You Are

My Life is NOT Your Script. I’m No Actress.

Published November 13, 2025 by tindertender

“When someone predicts what the future will be and you give your attention to that, you are lending your creative power to that outcome. The future is not set in stone. We are creating it right now. Especially ignore those who speak vile words of brokenness or unworthiness or weakness over your life.”

It annoys me to no end how masculines unseen, AND their feminine co-conspirators, demand that someone is no one unless their life matches some weird prophecy some random dude dreamt of in history long ago. My life is not a script. My life does not require their approval in order to BE. My life does not need to conform to their script or ideology. It seems to me they do not worship, and are not a part of, the same Living System the Mother Father Divine Most High have gifted the living, here. No. I will not shift my existence so you can “tolerate” it, actor, actress, script writers. You do not get to write my next “lifetime story” !!!!! In fact, I believe it is the Highest here now. Rewriting yours. It’s the end of your relationship with batteries. It’s the end of you trapping, and feeding upon, Gods family.

Precious Moments

Published November 9, 2025 by tindertender

With each year I become more grounded,
As my soul becomes more free,
I’ve grown roots that keep me stable,
I’m finally enjoying being me.

Life is now rich with simplicity,
I avoid the drama that some may bring,
I’m happy in my own company,
My heart has learned how to sing.

In each new silver hair I rejoice,
Aging is a blessing, some never know,
My journey has brought me so far,
And hopefully, still, some way to go.

I cherish each precious moment,
The laughter shared, the silent peace,
In every chapter, I now stand stoic,
With wisdom my worries cease.

So here’s to the years that shape and mold,
With knowledge gained and stories to tell,
I embrace the path that I have walked,
In this seasoned body, I’m happy to dwell ..

🖋️C.E. Coombes
🎨 Credit to unknown artist