I’ve come to the realization that the things and people in my life are there because I chose them, or allowed them to be.
I’ve also realized that I have been ‘settling’ … I’ve been settling for a shitty situation when beauty is right out in front of me, and I see it while others enjoy it. I hold myself back from it, while putting another before myself.
I’ve somehow convinced myself that by catering to another’s needs that I’m being caring and kind … when in actuality, I’ve become an enabler for one who cannot, or will not, take care of their own problems and needs.
When expressing my thoughts about this I was asked, “So, your problems are my problems?”
What a lovely and transparent thing to say. Now I am free from making their problems my problems any further.
Now, I come to the point of creating my future. I can tell you, it does not look like this.
Self love requires me to put myself first in the coming days, especially with this realization of how little my efforts to ensure the comfort and needs of another being met have been valued so very little.
I will not settle for this crappy situation in my future.
It is only I who can change it, by making new and different choices.
Self-love …
One cannot possibly love another sufficiently if one cannot even love themselves properly.
I write about this for the simple act of visually reading and acknowledging my own situation, and for convincing myself it is time to be a little bitchy … I’m no stepping stool.
Her teeth needed straightening, they would say. People would continue to attack her looks and her self-esteem to the point that she was very insecure, she believed what everyone said about her, admitting she was an “ugly duckling.”
When she first met him, she could not believe that a man was interested in her. She wanted him to see her world, so instead of going to a fancy, social event, she instead took him to the slums of the Lower East Side, where she did volunteer work, helping young immigrants.
The young man, who had held a rich, sheltered life, saw things he would never forget — sweat shops where women labored long hours for low wages and squalid tenements where children worked for hours until they dropped with exhaustion.
This walking tour profoundly changed the young man, moving him to say, that he “could not believe human beings lived that way.”
The young man’s name was Franklin D. Roosevelt, and the young woman, who changed his life forever, who would change the world forever, her name was Anna Eleanor Roosevelt.
They would eventually marry. On March 4, 1933, Franklin D. Roosevelt would be inaugurated as the 32nd President of the United States and Anna Eleanor Roosevelt would become the First Lady. At first, Anna Eleanor Roosevelt remained shy. She would also continue to be ridiculed by the press, making fun of her stout figure, toothy smile, and way of dress. Even her own mother-in-law, still over-protective of her son, would tell Eleanor’s own children that their mother was boring.
But, being First Lady allowed Eleanor Roosevelt to see more of the world, to see how the rest of the nation lived, outside of her privileged surroundings. She started speaking up for women, African-Americans, and children. And, she started influencing her husband, telling him what she saw.
She would continue to receive hate mail for her views, but it just made her stronger, more determined.
When the Daughters of the American Revolution boycotted the 1936 concert of African-American singer Marian Anderson, she would resign her membership and helped organize a new concert in front of the Lincoln Memorial that made history.
She flew with black (male) pilots and helped the Tuskegee Airmen in their successful effort to become the first black combat pilots.
She would be nominated three times, during her lifetime, for a Nobel Peace Prize. She became a renowned social and political activist, journalist, educator, and diplomat. Throughout her time as First Lady, and for the remainder of her life, she was a high profile supporter of the Civil Rights Movement, of equal rights for women, and of social reforms to uplift the poor.
Even after her husband’s passing, she remained active in politics for the rest of her life. President Truman would appoint her as a U.S. Delegate to the United Nations, where she would receive a standing ovation when the Universal Declaration of Human Rights was adopted on December 10, 1948.
She would chair President Kennedy’s ground-breaking committee which helped start second-wave feminism, the Presidential Commission on the Status of Women. And, she continued supporting women, even personally assisting in the careers of many women, providing them with guidance, giving them hope.
She would still remember when they called her an ugly duckling when she was growing up, but to the world, she was and continues to be a beautiful swan whose beauty inside helped her speak the truth, making the world a little better for all.
“In the Lakota/Sioux tradition, a person who is grieving is considered most waken, most holy.
There’s a sense that when someone is struck by the sudden lightning of loss, he or she stands on the threshold of the spirit world. The prayers of those who grieve are considered especially strong, and it is proper to ask them for their help.
You might recall what it’s like to be with someone who has grieved deeply. The person has no layer of protection, nothing left to defend. The mystery is looking out through that person’s eyes. For the time being, he or she has accepted the reality of loss and has stopped clinging to the past or grasping at the future. In the groundless openness of sorrow, there is a wholeness of presence and a deep natural wisdom.”
― Tara Brach
The question I have is, “Who is intentionally creating situations which throw masses of people into the grieving state, and what are they using the energy created in the nearness to the spirit realms for?
To all those who so selflessly do what they can, what their skills allow them to do to help the people, to help others rise, leaving toxicity behind, Thank You.
The blessings you share are often unrecognized for what they are, for the ailing really have no knowledge or experience to base their improvement on.
As the toxic ways of the past are shed, the habitual and trained thought processes remain for a time causing them to question the goodness that has been bestowed upon them.
After all, why would anyone care so much, be so selfless?
It is a complex journey, from dis-ease to wellness. The energy, the physical form mends, yet only an individual can choose a new way of thinking. For the stubborn in habit, this can take time.
Thank you for never giving up, especially if the ailing one questions your goodness. Thank you for seeing the sickness in them, inWE, and remaining patient, and in love.
It is my greatest blessing to have come to be in this world, consciously, with you.
My dream is as yours, to see humanity and all forms of life be able to rise from the suffering which has created its home in their lives for so long.
Self love, self care is so important. Without it, we simply look for its supply from outside ourselves, and most often left wanting.
We’ve been played against eachother for so long, vying for the love of the masculine. Pulled sometimes into love of the feminine for the lack we discover elsewhere.
It is plain that true lack is on the inside. We’ve forgotten how to deeply love our self, so busy have we been at sending love and support to those outside our self … we have left WE behind, and many times look at each other as though we are enemy.
It’s a game you see.
If the feminine can be separated, then true healing, true nurturing cannot occur, for it is the woman who does this.
If she is lacking herself, and if there is no sisterhood to support her, then her cup will run empty and the whole world suffers.
It is time to leave behind that viscous vampire that demands so much yet gives so little, to none.
The roses are in bloom, yet many rose bushes are bare, no flowers appear there. The woman has been convinced to clip her own flower, giving it to the masculine, where it dies in short form … requiring the clipping of yet another one of her beautiful flowers, where the cycle repeats. This has been an intentional manipulation by those who know the power of women and their healing abilities.
They desire a sick world, with sick and unstable people, because it is that world which is easily controlled.
The feminine must nurture and heal herself. She must band with her sisters, leaving behind the desire for love from that which destroys, replacing that need, for a time, with her own deep love.
Bringing health to self, she will then be able to bring health to the whole. Mending the aspects of masculinity, healing our ailing sisters, so that all roses bloom, so that the love we seek will actually be present and healthy.
At this time, the only thing we will find is more who wish to suck our vibrancy until they’ve had their fill and discard us without helping replenish what they’ve taken.
Spiritually speaking, we are lacking, severely. It is only we who can turn it around.
My sisters, the women who nurture, who mend, who heal … it is time to reconnect with the deepest self love you can muster. Your cup must be filled, and in these times it is you who must fill it.
Let all else rest for a while as you nurture yourself and fill your cup. The men will be fine, the ‘friends’ will be fine, although they will make a ruckus. They’ve been used to you filling their cups, leaving no thing for yourself. When you start to retain goodness for self, they will reject the idea of you embracing you. Most will demand that you stop, and continue feeding the beast … their own selfish needs.
Our sexual energy is not for gratification alone. This energy builds worlds … the world of (y)our choice, or the world of another’s choice.
We’ve gone from being “of service to the people” to being “servant”.
Claim your power, your energy. You will need to be operating at maximum force for what is coming.
We need you healed (not heeled). We need you whole, your cup full to the point of overflow. It is this overflow which will heal others, indeed, the whole of the world. And when necessary, when the cup begins to empty once more, it will be for healing the sick and ailing energies of this world … the people, the animals, the plants, GAIA, our Mother.
It is the women that hold it all together.
Let us stop allowing the controllers to pit us one against the other.
It is thisdivision that allows the most harm be done to our world.
This is our responsibility.
We shucked this responsibility for the promise of love. The promise of love that turned out to be manipulation and a form of slavery. (Many times, some have been fortunate and still bloom in love. Let them not leave their sisters behind, the sickness is growing).
We must bring emotional, energetic love back to self, reeling in all energies which are scattered, claiming them as our birthright, filling our own cup until it runneth over, spilling healthy, happy and whole into this depleted world.
You (We) are the healer.
You (We) are the nurturer.
Heal and nurture self, and the whole world will benefit.
One evening my mother made dinner after a hard day’s work. She put a plate of eggs, salad and burnt toast in front of my father…
I immediately noticed, the burnt toast…. And, I was waiting to see if he was going to complain about it, but my father started to eat them, smiling and asked me how I spent my day at school…
My mom apologized to my dad for the burnt toast. I will never forget his response to her: “Honey, I love burnt toast!”
Later when I went to bed and my dad came over to kiss me goodnight, I asked him if he really liked the burnt toast?
He hugged me and said, “Your mother has had a difficult day and she is really tired. She went out of her way to prepare this meal for us, why blame her and hurt her. Burnt toast never hurt anyone; but words can be very painful!”
We have to know how to appreciate what others do for us, even if it’s not perfect, because it’s the intention to do well that counts, and no one is perfect.
We are the warrior movement of peace. We are the power of spirit embraced. We are accepting the blessings of every direction. We are the students of a Fierce Grace. Be here now…
from Rhythmic Meditation, released May 25, 2013 Produced for Beautiful Chorus by DiViNCi of SoS
One of the best remedies for overcoming the sadness that you feel concerning where the planet and humanity is at, is by doing your part in bringing kindness, compassion and care in any way you can.
You may think you’re too insignificant to make a difference however every kind gesture of service that you offer can be of huge benefit to another.
I know the spine is a tricky thing … its health can inhibit or prohibit beneficial work.
Sometimes I think the damages acquired throughout life are intentional, not by the one who experiences them, but by those who wish to inhibit progress.
It is clear that all thoughts and desires are not merely belonging to an individual, but to those who implant the thought or desire, again, in an attempt to inhibit progress.
Some may say this is an attempt to shuck responsibility.
A child cannot be responsible for its own programming …. this is an implant, or training, which continues throughout life in various forms, with the use of various abilities and technologies.
This comes in two general categories … those who wish to control life, and those who wish to be free, and seek the freedom and harmony of the whole.
All one need do is examine the heart. Does the thought or action resonate with the innermost part of the being? If not, it does not belong there and can be thought of as a manipulation effort.
This is my perspective, and I understand it does not align with that of many.
My purpose with this particular post is to acknowledge those who understand, and to tell you how greatly I appreciate your efforts to bring about harmony in this world, in that of other worlds, and in the hearts of life itself.
You are undervalued and misunderstood by most. To be truthful, I myself have difficulties understanding that which I was never exposed to as a youth, or otherwise.
opensenseme 