What exactly does it mean to exercise ones Will?
I once compared it to being stubborn. Perhaps I still do.
I read somewhere that it is possible to transform stubborn Will into skillful Will.
As often as I think of it, it has yet to materialize.
What does one do, after all, to be considered “skillful”?
Would it be better to note that to be a person of skillful will it be required to do what is right and good and healthy despite stubborn Will saying, “I’ll do what I want.”?
What have I learned today?
I learned that somehow in all this mess I have been extremely blessed. By surprise I might add. So much so I purchased matching pendant and earrings for a piedersite (sp?) stone ring I have.
Why did this good fortune befall me today? I wonder.
I purchased an aura photo. Bright yellows all around.
I bought “buy two get two free” bras and panties.
And I still wonder at it all.
I donated a monetary gift in exchange for a light reading and gained knowledge. It was a lovely exchange as always.
I ask myself if I have grown fond of being a walking portal … stubborn, stubborn.
I am told the color red is like a welcome mat for unclean spirits. I have seen evidence that may be true.
Surely I am not the only human being pushing a little here, pulling a little there. Is it beneficial? I cannot say, for although my experience has been for the last many years, the experience in itself is new to me.
Anyhow … red … I now need to paint two red walls green, or another color, in three days. Home Depot is closed so today I sit idle.
My red candle had its wick fall into the wax and it stopped burning.
Now there is an orange one, in a glass jar.
I am just now reminded of being 18 and keeping a journal. I wrote some angry and hurtful things in there “to” the person I was living with. It was found. Tears were shed. I stopped journaling.
When I write, it doesn’t “sound” the same as when I “speak”. Could it be true that simply slowing down to write shows what it would be like if one “thought” before they spoke? And now … “thinking” before one thinks.
Some go on and on about my attitude, and I reply that “attitude” is my dancing partner. Tis true. Since when? That is the question. I think, “Ya, you really going to write all that down?” Ha. 🤯
Really bad dudes. You’re doing something to call them in. I’ve discovered cannabis is a contributor to opening a portal in my mind. Not always a good thing, especially with really bad dudes in the unseen on the prowl.
Paint the walls; sprinkle prayed over and blessed salt water everywhere; stop using thc; eat more greens and less carbs and sugar; stop with the tarot cards; clean up energy fields.
Get “off the wagon” and walk.
54 years of age. I just danced and behaved in such a belligerent fashion I reminded myself of a 15 year old me, without all the stamina, haha … alone in my living room … rebelling against the invisibles …. after using the cannabis plant, one of them said, “Heroin has been decriminalized.” Well, I’ve seen people die from using that … no thank you, Pusherman.
I find it interesting that the invisibles correlate cannabis to heroin.
“I don’t want this one” and invisible said …. good …. I guess I’ve been successful in my endeavor then.
For much of my life I made myself ugly, so few felt comfortable getting too close to me. It seems I flow in and out of this behavior. Even with myself!
I make a list of “wrongs” and then am inclined to grow a list of what is “right” … or a list of gratitude.
Not all things can be balanced … or can they?
Advice to self … Don’t attempt, or try, or hope, or wish … just DO it.
Candle flame = Portal
THC = Portal
Sugar and Carbs = Feeds the Portal occupants
Find King James Version of the Bible, read Psalms and Proverbs
Prep walls for paint
Stop calling them ‘to’ me
Reformat habitual pattern
I’ve got a Love candle … a Love flame flickering in my living room … just don’t stare at the flame dear … I tell myself.