All posts tagged Relationship

Questions and Realization

Published November 26, 2020 by tindertender

What exactly does it mean to exercise ones Will?

I once compared it to being stubborn. Perhaps I still do.

Stubborn Will

I read somewhere that it is possible to transform stubborn Will into skillful Will.

As often as I think of it, it has yet to materialize.

What does one do, after all, to be considered “skillful”?

Would it be better to note that to be a person of skillful will it be required to do what is right and good and healthy despite stubborn Will saying, “I’ll do what I want.”?

What have I learned today?

I learned that somehow in all this mess I have been extremely blessed. By surprise I might add. So much so I purchased matching pendant and earrings for a piedersite (sp?) stone ring I have.

Why did this good fortune befall me today? I wonder.

I purchased an aura photo. Bright yellows all around.

I bought “buy two get two free” bras and panties.

And I still wonder at it all.

I donated a monetary gift in exchange for a light reading and gained knowledge. It was a lovely exchange as always.

I ask myself if I have grown fond of being a walking portal … stubborn, stubborn.

I am told the color red is like a welcome mat for unclean spirits. I have seen evidence that may be true.

Surely I am not the only human being pushing a little here, pulling a little there. Is it beneficial? I cannot say, for although my experience has been for the last many years, the experience in itself is new to me.

Anyhow … red … I now need to paint two red walls green, or another color, in three days. Home Depot is closed so today I sit idle.

My red candle had its wick fall into the wax and it stopped burning.

Now there is an orange one, in a glass jar.

I am just now reminded of being 18 and keeping a journal. I wrote some angry and hurtful things in there “to” the person I was living with. It was found. Tears were shed. I stopped journaling.

When I write, it doesn’t “sound” the same as when I “speak”. Could it be true that simply slowing down to write shows what it would be like if one “thought” before they spoke? And now … “thinking” before one thinks.

Some go on and on about my attitude, and I reply that “attitude” is my dancing partner. Tis true. Since when? That is the question. I think, “Ya, you really going to write all that down?” Ha. 🤯

Really bad dudes. You’re doing something to call them in. I’ve discovered cannabis is a contributor to opening a portal in my mind. Not always a good thing, especially with really bad dudes in the unseen on the prowl.

Paint the walls; sprinkle prayed over and blessed salt water everywhere; stop using thc; eat more greens and less carbs and sugar; stop with the tarot cards; clean up energy fields.

Get “off the wagon” and walk.

54 years of age. I just danced and behaved in such a belligerent fashion I reminded myself of a 15 year old me, without all the stamina, haha … alone in my living room … rebelling against the invisibles …. after using the cannabis plant, one of them said, “Heroin has been decriminalized.” Well, I’ve seen people die from using that … no thank you, Pusherman.

I find it interesting that the invisibles correlate cannabis to heroin.

“I don’t want this one” and invisible said …. good …. I guess I’ve been successful in my endeavor then.

For much of my life I made myself ugly, so few felt comfortable getting too close to me. It seems I flow in and out of this behavior. Even with myself!

I make a list of “wrongs” and then am inclined to grow a list of what is “right” … or a list of gratitude.

Not all things can be balanced … or can they?

Advice to self … Don’t attempt, or try, or hope, or wish … just DO it.

Candle flame = Portal

THC = Portal

Sugar and Carbs = Feeds the Portal occupants

Find King James Version of the Bible, read Psalms and Proverbs

Prep walls for paint

Stop calling them ‘to’ me

Reformat habitual pattern

I’ve got a Love candle … a Love flame flickering in my living room … just don’t stare at the flame dear … I tell myself.

Love Is …

Published July 30, 2020 by tindertender

Love is not NOT making mistakes.

It is making lots of mistakes.

Miscommunication. Grumpiness. Anger. Hurt. Annoyance.

Love is being able to clean up those mistakes, like a champ.

Own what is yours:

Where did you mess up?

Where did you drop the ball?

How will you be better next time?

Where did your actions become misaligned with your words?

How did you contribute to the communication breakdown?

How will you build it back up?

When did you stop choosing love, and instead choose your hurt feelings, or anger, or loneliness?

To be good at love, you need nothing but humility and awareness. Ability to get on your knees without groveling.

Desire to make amends without sulking.

Willingness to create something better than you ever saw before. Something better than you think you are capable of.

Love is not for the perfect shiny ones.

Just the ones doing the work, slowly slaying the dragons of self-sabotage.

To great life-changing love.;

Oracle Reading 6-19-2020

Published June 19, 2020 by tindertender

A Relationship Reading, whether it be your boss, lover, friend, sibling or parent.

YOU (vulnerability): You may be feeling like you should withdraw. This is an opportunity to wait and regroup. You are in need of rest and relaxation. You might even be feeling overwhelmed. Take some much needed down time. Take in your surroundings. Notice the season and the changes that are taking place out in nature. Things are continually evolving. Think about the clouds you see in the sky. They are constantly moving, changing and reshaping themselves. Allow yourself to connect with Mother Earth and nature in a deeper way. Align your rhythm with the heartbeat of the Earth and slow your thoughts and emotions down. Trust that everything will work out. The signs that things work themselves out are all around you. Take notice.

The OTHER (culmination of vision): Time to take positive action toward your goals and dreams. Be adaptable and fine tune any details of what you are creating. Reflect on your desires and make sure your attitude and beliefs are in alignment with what you wish to accomplish. Let go of any aspect or quality that no longer fits what you intend to accomplish.

The COMBINED Energies (the big picture): There is so much more going on than you realize. When we get up in our heads and over think things, we start to miss much of what is going on in the world around us. You might be trying to micromanage a situation and are too focused on small details. Try looking at this from different angles. If you’ve been struggling with a problem or tough situation, it’s possible you will find the answers if you stand back and view everything from a larger perspective or someone else’s viewpoint.

The INSIGHT or GUIDANCE around the situation (keep your dreams alive): Start to identify plans and actions that will lead you to achieve your dreams and goals. Your dreams can become your reality. This is a time when you need to be able to apply detailed planning in order to manifest your dreams and realize your goals. Need to remain focused on the practical side of things. Keep your feet firmly planted on the ground. It is easy to be distracted by more ideas and concepts. Keep focused on what is realistic and achievable. Your common sense and pragmatic approach will lead you to a solution that actually works. Begin taking steps that will bring you closer to your dreams.

Reading from the deck “Nature’s Whispers Oracle Cards created by Angela Hartfield and Josephine Wall

Keep Your Dreams Alive

Beloved Sisters

Published June 17, 2020 by tindertender

You are deep soul women. You won’t find a worthy love in the shallows. Within your chest beats a heart from light. You are from stars.

Beloved Sisters ~

You deserve Divine Masculine. The One who sees you as Holy. Sees you like the high priestess that you are.

Who worships you at your altar as you do theirs in body, mind, spirit and Heart. Someone whose words are prayers pressed openly against your bare Soul.

You deserve someone who sees your loving Heart, free and wild.

Divine Love grows in the Light and honors you, not dismisses you.

You deserve someone who sees the magic that surrounds you as you move between the worlds and feel between the layers of time.

You deserve someone who understands your deep Soul-work, to walk the path of your ancient mystery.

Beloved Sisters ~

You deserve someone who understands you swim in the unknown, you move between worlds and among the shadows. And disappear at times into the realm of the unseen.

And your Love is so strong in time and space that you will always return to them .

You deserve someone who will choose you fully and build a world with you. One of peace, Love and passion.

One and only who embraces you in your wholeness.

Who understands your deep loving, healing Heart in every loving breath in between.

Beloved Sisters ~

You deserve one who loves the fire in your Heart, in your spirit, in your veins. One who celebrates you for all that you are.

Sisters, hold your head high for the One who can see your bright Light. A spirit with a warrior’s heart to match your own heart.

You are born to shine.

You are a deep soul woman. And you won’t find a worthy love in the shallows. Those who are unworthy can never truly see your Light.

Dear Sisters ~

Somewhere on this planet there is One worthy of your love and sees your magic.

Somewhere on this planet beats a Divine Heart deserving your fire. Who is not afraid to dance with your Soul in your endless depths into the unknown.

~ Viera Grossmann



Published March 11, 2020 by tindertender

Written by:

Be careful of the extra devoted, the extra serious about you.

They might just be trying to fit you into a box.

What they might like the most about you, is the opportunity you’ve given them to check off the box of “stable relationship.”

Maybe they like that you make them feel good. Just a distraction from what’s going on elsewhere.

Sometimes being available and eager to commit, is not the healthiest thing.

Sometimes, prioritizing a person over another person, is not what should be done.

You can feel it in your bones: Are they looking THROUGH you, instead of at you? Are they eager to “lock you down,” simply because they are afraid of being alone?

Are they more nervous to be SINGLE, than what it means to be without YOU?

Are they in constant search of The One, and you just happen to be the convenient one available at this time?

Or, do you feel the hunger FOR YOU?

Your values, you identity, what makes you feel safe, loved, nourished, seen?

Are they curious about your life and wanting to be a part of it, to as much or as little as what feels good for you?

You know if someone wants you or just wants a partner, by how they treat you day to day.

The moment that you stop fulfilling their idolized partner role, is the moment they might crush you, leave you, abandon all kindness and respect.

Look for the ones who want to know all of who you are. Regardless if it is convenient for them. Regardless if it feeds their ego and makes them feel better or worse.

When they let you into their world, you will know it’s for real.

And it’s for keeps.

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