I had some running around to do today and I found myself at Fred Meyer after a time to purchase a few things.

As I entered the checkout line, I came behind another who was male. The groceries he was purchasing looked odd for a man. Fresh vegetables galore! I thought, he must be vegetarian.

I mentioned that I liked his grocery list, that is was rare to see a man with these items being bought. He said his wife gave him the list.

The teller said shopping and cleaning was women’s work. The fellow in front of me stated that women do not receive a salary for raising children, and he wanted to step up where he could. And that he cleaned frequently at home to help out.

I said, “I’m going to love you, right now. Tell your wife.” And he proceeded to look a tad uncomfortable as he rolled away with his cart full of the good stuff.

The teller continued to tell me how cleaning was women’s work. He said he’d build a fence or whatever, but that was women’s work. That he did not like it. I told him, “None of us like it, we do it because it needs to be done.” (Except, I really do not like housework, and I have fur everywhere from my doggies, so, my place is never pristine).

Anyhow, I found it quite interesting seeing these two males, in stark contrast to each other. One, willing, and putting in the effort to help his woman. The other, blatantly stating he is not a partner, but an expector, a chaos maker, rather than a soother.

I drove away in amazement. I wondered if there would ever be a male that would want to partner with me in such a way. Unfortunately, my experiences have not included the sacred male, just his self-centered counterpart of the masculine.

I wonder, am I a bad person? (Am I that which I see and have experienced?) How is it that I never encountered a true partner, but instead those who were out seeking their own gratification, not ever considering my heart, or my love. Instead, tossing it (me) to the curb when they were ‘finished’ with me.

I’m told I have an attitude problem. My thought is it was developed by man. He forced it into life by not being a sufficient partner, able or willing to handle the fire this one woman embodies.

My hope is that selfishness will leave the building once and for all. For ALL.

Amen, and all that Jazz.