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Smudging

Published November 3, 2020 by tindertender

Our Native elders have taught us that before a person can be healed or heal another, one must be cleansed of any bad feelings, negative thoughts, bad spirits or negative energy – cleansed both physically and spiritually. This helps the healing to come through in a clear way, without being distorted or sidetracked by negative “stuff” in either the healer or the client. The elders say that all ceremonies, tribal or private, must be entered into with a good heart so that we can pray, sing, and walk in a sacred manner, and be helped by the spirits to enter the sacred realm.

Native people throughout the world use herbs to accomplish this. One common ceremony is to burn certain herbs, take the smoke in one’s hands and rub or brush it over the body. Today this is commonly called “smudging.” In Western North America the three plants most frequently used in smudging are sage, cedar, and sweetgrass.

Sage
There are many varieties of sage, and most have been used in smudging. The botanical name for “true” sage is Salvia (e.g. Salvia officinalis, Garden Sage, or Salvia apiana, White Sage). It is interesting to note that Salvia comes from the Latin root salvare, which means “to heal.” There are also varieties of sage which are of a species separate from Salvin Artemusia. Included here are sagebrush (e.g. Artemisia californica) and mugwort (Artemisia vulgaris). We have seen both Salvia and Artemisia sub-species used in smudging.

Sage is burned in smudging ceremonies to drive out bad spirits, feelings, or influences, and also to keep bad spirits from entering the area where a ceremony takes place. In Plains nations, the floor of the sweat lodge is frequently covered with sage, and participants rub the leaves on their bodies while in the sweat. Sage is also commonly spread on the ground in a lodge or on an altar where the pipe touches the earth. Some nations wrap their pipes in sage when they are placed in pipe-bundles, as sage purifies objects wrapped in it. Sage wreaths are also placed around the head and wrists of Sundancers.

Cedar
There is some potential confusion here about the terms used to name plants, mainly because in some areas, junipers are known as “cedar” – as in the case of Desert White Cedar (Juniperus monosperina). This doesn’t mean that J. monosperina wasn’t used as a cleansing herb, though; in the Eastern U.S., its relative, Eastern Red Cedar (Juniperus virginia), was used ceremonially. However, in the smudging ceremonies we have seen or conducted ourselves, Western Red Cedar (Thuja occidentalis) and California Cedar Incense (Libocedrus descurrens) were used … not varieties of juniper.

Cedar is burned while praying either aloud or silently. The prayers rise on the cedar smoke and are carried to the Creator. Cedar is also spread along with sage on the floor of the sweat lodges of some tribes. Cedar branches are brushed in the air to cleanse a home during the House Blessing Ceremony of many Northwest Indian nations. In the Pacific Northwest, the people burn cedar for purification in much the same way as sage – it drives out negative energy; but it also brings in good influences. The spirit of cedar is considered very ancient and wise by Pacific Northwest tribes, and old, downed cedar trees are honored with offerings and prayers.

Sweetgrass
One of the most sacred plants for the Plains Indians, sweetgrass is a tall wild grass with a reddish bas and perfume-like, musty odor. It grows mainly on the eastern side of the Rockies in Montana and adjacent Alberta, Canada. It also shows up in some small areas of Wyoming and South Dakota. Its botanical name is Hierochloe odorata. Some common names for it are Seneca grass, holy grass and vanilla grass. We have been told that a variety of vanilla grass grows in North Central California. But, how similar it is to the Plains variety we don’t know.

On the Plains, sweetgrass is usually braided together in bunches as a person’s hair is braided, although friends have said they have seen it simply bunched and wrapped in cloth. Either way, it is usually burned by shaving little bits over hot coals or lighting the end and waving it around, letting the smoke spread through the air. This latter method is how we were taught to burn sweetgrass in the sweat lodge – allowing the purifying smoke to get to all parts of the lodge.

We were taught that it was good to burn sweetgrass after the sage or cedar had driven out the bad influences. Sweetgrass brings in the good spirits and the good influences. As with cedar, burning sweetgrass while praying sends prayers up to the Creator in the smoke. High Hollow Horn says in the The Sacred Pipe “This smoke from the sweetgrass will rise up to you, and will spread throughout the universe. Its fragrance will be known by the wingeds, the four-leggeds, and the two leggeds, for we understand that we are all relatives; may all our brothers be tame and not fear us!” Sweetgrass is also put in pipe bundles and medicine bundles along with sage to purify and protect sacred objects.

Sweetgrass is very rare today, its territory severely cut by development, cattle- grazing, and wheat fields – and tradition Indians in the northern Plains are trying to protect the last remaining fields. The best way for most folks to get sweetgrass is to buy it at Native American retail outlets. This gives support to Indians who can help the fields from being depleted.

Smudging
To do a smudging ceremony, burn the clippings of these herbs (dried), rub your hands in the smoke, and then gather the smoke and bring it into your body, or – rub it onto yourself; especially onto any area you feel needs spiritual healing. Keep praying all the while that the unseen powers of the plant will cleanse your spirit. Sometimes, one person will smudge another, or a group of people, using hands – or more often a feather – to lightly brush the smoke over the other person(s). We were taught to look for dark spots in a person’s spirit-body. As one California Indian woman told us, she “sees” a person’s spirit-body glowing around them, and where there are “dark or foggy parts,” she brushes the smoke into these “holes in their spirit-body.” This helps to heal the spirit and to “close up” these holes.

Recently we did a “light” house cleansing for a friend. We use the term “light”, for this is a relatively simple ceremony as opposed to some that are more lengthy and complicated. Our friend had some serious emotional and relationship problems, and he felt they had left a heavy and dark atmosphere.

First, we prayed together to the Creator and to the spirits for help. We then, burned sage, purified ourselves, and took the sage to all the corners, closets, and rooms of the house. We pushed the smoke with our hands to cleanse every bit of space – lingering over dark or cold spots that “felt” uncomfortable.

We used sage first in order to drive out the bad influences. Then we purified ourselves with cedar and, then repeated the cleansing process throughout the house with that. Then sweetgrass was used in the same manner to bring in good influences. All the time we prayed for help in this cleansing. Finally, we took a candle over the whole house and pushed its light into every corner. The People of the Pacific Northwest Coast taught this “lighting-up” of a house to us. We’ve been doing this type of house cleansing for ten years, and it never fails to “clear the air.”

In any case, smudging is a ceremony that must be done with care. We are entering into a relationship with the unseen powers of these plants, and with the spirits of the ceremony. As with all good relationships, there has to be respect and honor if the relationship is to work.

Shamanic smudging—or just smudging—is an age-old tribal tradition which has been used for centuries to create harmony and peace. There are many different shamanic smudging ceremonies, and different tribes use a variety of herbs for smudging.

To define it more clearly, shamanic smudging is the burning of herbs or incense for cleansing, purification, protection of physical and spiritual bodies, banishment of negative energies and creation of sacred space. You can use smudge sticks (herbs that are tied into a bundle for easier handling), braided herbs and botanicals (like sweetgrass) or loose herbs (burned on charcoal or mugwort, or in a firepit). Shamanic smudging releases the energy and fragrance of the herbs and botanicals so they can heal, cleanse and purify.

In many traditions, shamanic smudging involves a four directions ceremony or prayer, which sends specific kinds of smoke or prayers into the four directions. Different tribes have different smudging prayers that “program” the smoke to do a specific action, such as cleansing or aiding in divination.

In general, shamanic smudging can be used in daily life for practical purposes—to restore physical, mental and emotional balance; to shield against negative energies; to cleanse yourself, use your tools and clear your space; and to restore you sacred space.

COMMON HERBS USED IN SMUDGING
Although different tribes and traditions use different herbs for shamanic smudging, some of the most popular herbs include desert sage, white broadleaf sage, juniper, pinon (sometimes in resin form), sweetgrass, copal (in resin form), mugwort, lavender and sacred tobacco. Here are some general uses for the different herbs often used for smudging:

– PINON RESIN
Primarily fire element though can also be used as for four-element general purposes. Has a pleasant and meditative fragrance. Is cleansing, strengthening, warming, and used by Native American cultures for its spiritual and healing properties. Produces a thick stream of smoke, and is excellent for refreshing the senses and reviving a tired soul.

– COPAL GOLD RESIN
Primarily fire and water elements though can also be used as for four-element general purposes. When burned, the scent is sweet, resinous, slightly woody, mildly earthy and spicy. Was a holy incense used by the peoples of Mesoamerica. Traditionally used as incense in divinatory and cleansing ceremonies. The resin contains aromatic chemicals called terpenes, which make it volatile and flammable. Used by Mayan shamans prior to ingesting mushrooms.

– MYRRH RESIN
Primarily earth element though can also be used as for four-element general purposes. Produces a lot of smoke when burned, very earthy, piney scent. Gathered from an almost leafless Middle Eastern shrub called the Commiphora Molmol. It was used by the ancient Egyptians in rituals of Healing and Passing. It is one of the ingredients used by the Egyptians to embalm bodies. Useful for spirituality, meditation, happiness, release, transformation, strength, confidence and stability.

– FRANKINCENSE RESIN
Primarily fire element though can also be used for a four-element general purpose. Is the resin of an African tree and produces a rich, dense smoke when burned. Used extensively in meditation and healing. In numerous religious traditions, frankincense’s spiritual scent was believed to confer divine blessing. Pliny the Elder mentioned it as an antidote to hemlock poisoning.

– DESERT SAGE
Primarily air element though can also be used as for four-element general purposes. Has a somewhat sharp, light and refreshing scent. One of the most sacred herbs among Native Americans. Used to purify the mind, body and spirit before prayer, meditation, ritual or ceremony. Also used to purify sacred items such as pipes, magical tools, tarot decks and eagle feathers. Can be used for area, house and personal cleansing. Some people carry a small amount of Sage in a pocket or medicine pouch to insure personal and spiritual safety.

– JUNIPER
Primarily fire element though can also be used as for four-element general purposes. Has a sharp, piney scent. Excellent to stimulate and revive when tired in body, mind or Spirit. Used in ancient times for ritual purification of temples. Smoke believed to aid clairvoyance. Also useful for purification and to stimulate contact with other worlds. Burned during the Plague to resist disease.

– LAVENDER
Primarily air element . Has a light, aromatic and refreshing scent. Useful for attracting peace, happiness and restful sleep. Also reduces depression, grief and sorrow. Aids in meditation and divination, and often said to aid in manifestation. Known as Elf Leaf, Nard, Nardus, Spike and Lavender. Traditionally associated with fairies and elves.

– WHITE BROADLEAF SAGE
Primarily air element though can also be used as for four-element general purposes. This is a broad leaf sage is highly prized for its strong aromatic properties (strongest of the different types of sage). Considered the king if all sages. Excellent for meditation, divination, smudging, cleansing and purification.

– YERBA SANTA LEAVES
Traditionally used for enhancing psychic abilities, magical protection, healing and spiritual strength. Excellent for meditation and divination. Said to be ruled by the moon. One Native American tribe rolled the leaves into balls, dried it in the sun and chewed it for a natural mouthwash.

– HIBISCUS FLOWERS
Primarily fire and water elements. Produces a sharp, invigorating scent that lasts for a long time after burning. Often used in divination and psychic communication. Excellent for rejuvenating the senses and restoring life force.

– ROSE FLOWERS AND PETALS
Primarily water element. Produces a heavy, warm, aromatic scent with just a hint of sharpness – scent lasts a long time after burning. Excellent for meditation, divination, increasing psychic abilities, contacting powers and beings in other dimensions and psychic communication. Also traditionally associated with attracting love, conferring peace, stimulating sexual appetites and enhancing beauty.

– SWEETGRASS
Primarily air element. As its name suggests, sweetgrass produces a sweet and light fragrance that does not last for long. Excellent for cleansing sacred space. Sweetgrass is a rare grass which is found growing wild in very few places. Traditionally, sweetgrass is believed to invite the good spirits.

You can burn these herbs singly or in combination with each other. One good combination that covers all four magical elements of air, fire, water and earth is pine resin and sage (either desert sage or white broadleaf sage). This combination is appropriate for general use, cleansing, ceremony and ritual.

WHEN TO SMUDGE YOURSELF
Smudging yourself on a daily basis can be very helpful in keeping yourself balanced and maintaining a peaceful state of being. However, you should definitely use shamanic smudging techniques when you’ve been around people who are ill, depressed, fearful, angry or generally emotionally unbalanced; before meditating to create a calm state of being; when you’re feeling blue or depressed; or when you’ve been under a lot of stress.

Smudging yourself is easy. If you’re using a smudge stick, light the smudge stick on a candle flame. Hold the stick in the flame until there is a lot of smoke and the stick is burning well (that’s why a candle is better than a match—it can take a while to get the stick really smoking). Using a feather (or feather fan) or your hand, gently fan the smoke onto your body, starting at the top of the body and moving downward. Get the back of your body as best you can (it’s often easier to use a smudge pot and loose herbs for this). When you’re done, inhale a little of the smoke (just a little!) to purify your insides.

If you’re using a smudge pot or Fire-bowl and loose herbs, light the herbs (using self-lighting charcoal—not the barbecue kind!) until it is smoking well. Then, put the Fire-bowl on the ground and stand over it with your legs spread and feet on either side. Weave back and forth in the smoke until you have been thoroughly cleansed. Clothing is optional for this approach, and smudging in the nude is recommended for a more thorough cleansing. Again, when you’re done, inhale a little of the smoke to purify your insides. People often feel more relaxed, lighter and brighter after smudging.

If you’re going to use the smudge smoke during meditation, use a charcoal burner or Firebowl, light the herbs and enjoy the scent and smoke as you meditate. Meditating with these herbs often produces a deeper and longer-lasting state of relaxation and contemplation.

Native Americans used herbs to purify the spirit and bring balance to people who are unhealthy in spirit, mind, or body. Everything that happens within your home leaves a trace. The morning after party, the tired- ..but-happy revelry from the end of the evening is still in the air; Focusing your true intention to purify your space with time-honored method can return a dwelling to its rightful place as your sanctuary. One such cleansing method is known as smudging. Smudging originated as a Native American custom, and modern practice can reinvigorate your living space.

The vital action of smudging is lighting aromatic bundle of herbs and allowing it to burn away the negative energy that has been collected.

You can celebrate a new phase in life by conducting a smudging ceremony, or improve someone’s day by smudging the space around a friend. Offices and work spaces can benefit from smudging as well, allowing clarity of thought and improved productivity. The essential object for smudging is the herb bundle. It can be purchased or made by hand.

Using a match or candle, put the flame to the smudge stick. Then blow or wave it out, allowing the stick to smolder and the aromatic smoke to fill the room.

If you don’t have a smudge stick, you can also place loose herbs directly onto burning wood in an indoor fireplace or into a fireproof container with some charcoal. As the herbs begin to burn, the honored method is to use a feather to move the smoke around the person or place you are smudging. You may also use your hands. As you feel the space fill with the herbal scent, take time to consider the parts of your life that need cleansing. Imagine the smoke lifting away all the negative thoughts and emotions around you.

Tradition teaches that each smudging herb is used for a different purpose. So an important aspect of the ritual is finding the right herb for the moment. * Sage is the most prominent herb and is used to purify and protect one’s living area by removing negative energy.

* Sweetgrass is often burnt after smudging sage to welcome in the positive influences.
* Lavender restores balance and creates a peaceful atmosphere. It also attracts love.
* Rosemary is effective for gaining clarity about perplexing problems.
* Mugwort is celebrated for stimulating psychic awareness and powerful dreams.
* Bay leaf is used to protect against colds and flu.
* Cedar is burnt upon moving into a new home. It works as a purifier and as a way to attract positive energy. The act of cleansing your space can help you to truly put the past behind you. As the herbal aromas gently enter a room, clearing out accumulated spiritual clutter, you’ll be free you to enjoy your abode as the place of it was meant to be.

~ Author unknown

A Friday Poem

Published October 30, 2020 by tindertender

~ By Clare Dubois, Founder of TreeSisters
www.TreeSisters.org/give

Image thank you to our artist partner Tamara Phillips ART

How do I know
Who I am
When all I have been taught
Is who to be
According to rules
That belong to a past
That believed in the domination
Of nature
As a path to power.

How do I know
Who to be
When the judgment that gets thrown
Arises from a fear so old
That no one even knows
Why it’s wrong
To shine
Or show pleasure
As a woman
.

Why would I stay
Cooped up in a cage
Of shoulds and oughts
When this body
Is crafted from moonlight
And fire
And the deeper river
Of ancient knowing
Guides my every felt sense
Of what it means
To be a woman
.

So I stand
Shameless bright
My heart open wide
Wild crafted pleasure
And mountainous might
I define myself
As I set myself free
And I laugh out loud
As I birth a new me
For all women.

My Grandmother Once Gave Me A Tip

Published October 22, 2020 by tindertender

In difficult times, you move forward in small steps.
Do what you have to do, but little by little.
Don’t think about the future, or what may happen tomorrow.
Wash the dishes.
Remove the dust.
Write a letter.
Make a soup.
You see?
You are advancing step by step.
Take a step and stop.
Rest a little.
Praise yourself.
Take another step.
Then another.
You won’t notice, but your steps will grow more and more.
And the time will come when you can think about the future without crying.

~ Elena Mikhalkova

(Image of Tasha Tudor, American Illustrator 1915-2008)

Blessed Silence

Published October 22, 2020 by tindertender

I haven’t experienced ‘relative’ silence for nearly two decades. Yes, I was exposed to one heck of an egregore, 2 in fact. I’m surprised I survived it.

In the last two weeks the mind has gone quiet. It is odd, not listening to many folks speaking from the unseen. I am grateful.

It was so odd, in fact, and I had become so accustomed to it over the last 17 years, I found myself doing things that would actually make the mind noisy.

Last night though, the thought came to me … “Enjoy the silence. When was the last time you experienced it? You really have no idea how long it will last … enjoy it.”

And so I took a book to bed with me and read until I was sleepy.

And I woke this morning to silence, or near so.

And I reveled in it.

Just two short weeks ago this was such a different story.

Is the resonance calming, or have the egregories become distracted by another, or others? Either way, I’ll be thankful for this time and relish the ‘solitude’.

And I will focus on creating the life I desire.

And I will pull back all energies and efforts from that which does not serve this vision.

Thank you for the lessons. It was a difficult process, one that may not be finished … yet still, I must thank you for this reprieve.

And … breathe …

Something BIG must be happening

Published October 20, 2020 by tindertender

On a personal note …

The visitor log took a plunge today.

I had no idea this involved the entire globe. It is strange being judged by countries rather than individual people. I thought it was just a few folks, but no, it’s entire countries. No wonder they’ve been telling me to be very careful of what I say.

There are many aspects of the feminine under examination these days.

There once was a time when I thought to myself that there is no reason why I cannot get along with everybody. I can surely make efforts to that end.

It is unfortunate though that some lack capacity to accept people as they are … even I am having this issue. Yet I understand that accepting someone for who they are does not equate with sharing space with that someone.

We get to choose who and what we want in our life, what we will accept, or reject.

I am in process of reclaiming the energies I have spent on making others problems, my problems.

I am retraining myself to spend my attention and energies on promoting the things I desire in my life, things of benefit rather than drain.

~ A clean environment (whew! what a task!)
~ A nice, cozy and pretty place to rest my head at night.
~ Time to meditate and clear the head, making room for proper connections.
~ Art, painting, drawing, doing puzzles, creating blankets or what-nots.
~ Love … my pets are full of love, and they are hairy which makes the clean environment a task.

Repealing the energies given to another will be difficult, I do not care for being bitchy. So I focus instead on simply extracting myself and my efforts from the entanglement.

First here, then there.

I had no idea that settling for a situation could be so draining on potentials in life. Yet settling does just that.

When I was younger, if I did not care for a situation I removed myself from it. This time however, I need to pluck something from my environment, while staying put. It is difficult, especially when that something has become accustomed to a certain character performance by myself.

I never considered myself an enabler, until my subconscious picked up on it, insight gifted to me by those who wanted me to see. (Thank you).

I did not wish to follow in the path of my ancestors. Creating relationship, and then leaving it, only to start another. It does look like this is how it goes though …

I longed for steady, for the surety of it (whether it be relationship or dwelling), and I became the glue that held it all together. The one who worked at it so that it was stable.

It is now time to let it unravel though. I’m done pouring effort into something that will not improve, that will not advance the goodness in my life, no …. it only remains stagnant, feeding off what I agree to give.

I’ve come to the conclusion that it is I who needs my loving kindness and care … haha, do I even know what that looks like? I think not, and it is time to learn what it is, what it looks like, and what it feels like.

Yes, something BIG is happening.

They say the dead will walk the earth once more. This could be literal, which it may, and it could also mean that the sleeping herd of we, the sheeple, are waking up and understanding that we have been kept in a sort of limbo.

I know my future does not resemble the past 12 years … no, I’m aiming higher, rising to the occasion, at least, this is my intention.

I’m guessing this is happening in many minds right about now.

Realization …

After realization …

Failure

Published October 9, 2020 by tindertender

Going along in life it may sometimes feel as though everything has fallen apart, literally.

You may tell yourself you’ve failed, others may say the same, reaffirming your thoughts of insufficiency.

Since we are always at choice, we have the opportunity to shift perspective, to see it from another angle.

Perhaps when things seem to fall apart, or literally do, instead of seeing it as failure, seeing it as simply an opportunity to come at it from a different position, or frame of mind.

Perhaps it is an opportunity to realize that the way one is thinking about the situation needs rebirthing, refreshed.

Perhaps it is a necessary step in the process, a baby step if you will, to the next level of reality in the situation.

Usually, personal growth is made in increments. Every time there is a set back it can feel like a failure, but is only a step in the right direction, one step at a time, a continual birthing and death to perception of the circumstance.

Rather than allowing our self to fray and fall apart every time a step is made, every time we walk out of the old and into the new, an embrace for the newness ought to be cultivated in mind. A sense of gratitude for the progression in the issue, and indeed in life itself, held in mind and honored by the spirit within.

You are not failing my dear, nor are your efforts wasted. You are in a continual state of rebirthing yourself, ever more into higher perspectives and realities.

Medusa

Published October 7, 2020 by tindertender

“Medusa teaches us that we have the right to defend ourselves. So often we are taught that we need to put up with the actions of others in a quiet way, demurely accepting what others would put upon us. She shows us that we need to stand our ground when someone would do us harm. We are not here to quietly accept the intentions of others. We have the right to be safe.

Medusa tells us to know our power and to honor the gifts that swim within our veins, even though sometimes it may feel like more of a curse than a blessing. She brings us the wisdom of the snake, of transformation and of rebirth. She asks that we too hold up the mirrored shield towards those that would wish us ill and reflect back upon them what they have created.

Medusa reminds us that there will always be those who will spit venom at us, in word and deed. That does not make them right. We are not here to be the plaything of others. We are Sacred Priestesses of the Divine. And we will not back down.”

~Ara

Elder’s Meditation of the Day 10-5-2020

Published October 5, 2020 by tindertender

“The dances are prayers.”
–Pop Chalee, TAOS PUEBLO

When we dance to the drum we pray to the Creator and attract the heartbeat of the earth. We never dance without reason; every dance has a purpose. We dance for rain; we dance for healing; we dance for seasons; we dance for joy; we dance for our children; we dance for the people; we dance for courage. The drum plays to the beat of the heart, to the beat of the Earth. The drum connects us to the Earth while we dance our prayers.

Oh, Great One, let my dance and prayer be heard by You.

Copied with the permission of Don L. Coyhis, from the book Meditations with Native American Elders: The Four Seasons

If anyone would like to purchase the book is can be found at:
Coyhis Publishing at: http://www.coyhispublishing.com/…/meditations-with… Or Amazon at: http://www.amazon.com/gp/offer-listing/1605304514/ref

How I Became A Warrior

Published October 2, 2020 by tindertender

Once, I ran from fear
so fear controlled me.
Until I learned to hold fear like a newborn.
Listen to it, but not give in.
Honour it, but not worship it.
Fear could not stop me anymore.
I walked with courage into the storm.
I still have fear,
but it does not have me.

Once, I was ashamed of who I was.
I invited shame into my heart.
I let it burn.
It told me, “I am only trying
to protect your vulnerability”.
I thanked shame dearly,
and stepped into life anyway,
unashamed, with shame as a lover.

Once, I had great sadness
buried deep inside.
I invited it to come out and play.
I wept oceans. My tear ducts ran dry.
And I found joy right there.
Right at the core of my sorrow.
It was heartbreak that taught me how to love.

Once, I had anxiety.
A mind that wouldn’t stop.
Thoughts that wouldn’t be silent.
So I stopped trying to silence them.
And I dropped out of the mind,
and into the Earth.
Into the mud.
Where I was held strong
like a tree, unshakeable, safe.

Once, anger burned in the depths.
I called anger into the light of myself.
I felt its shocking power.
I let my heart pound and my blood boil.
Listened to it, finally.
And it screamed, “Respect yourself fiercely now!”.
“Speak your truth with passion!”.
“Say no when you mean no!”.
“Walk your path with courage!”.
“Let no one speak for you!”
Anger became an honest friend.
A truthful guide.
A beautiful wild child.

Once, loneliness cut deep.
I tried to distract and numb myself.
Ran to people and places and things.
Even pretended I was “happy”.
But soon I could not run anymore.
And I tumbled into the heart of loneliness.
And I died and was reborn
into an exquisite solitude and stillness.
That connected me to all things.
So I was not lonely, but alone with All Life.
My heart One with all other hearts.

Once, I ran from difficult feelings.
Now, they are my advisors, confidants, friends,
and they all have a home in me,
and they all belong and have dignity.
I am sensitive, soft, fragile,
my arms wrapped around all my inner children.
And in my sensitivity, power.
In my fragility, an unshakeable Presence.

In the depths of my wounds,
in what I had named “darkness”,
I found a blazing Light
that guides me now in battle.

I became a warrior
when I turned towards myself.

And started listening.

~ Jeff Foster with Leslie Miller