Growth

All posts tagged Growth

Elder’s Meditation 9-5-19

Published September 5, 2019 by tindertender

“Decisions that have been made for the last couple of centuries have been decisions made without the presence of a real God….from the vision, not of God, but of money.”

— Tom Porter, MOHAWK

As we view the world today, it’s easy to see the people are off track. We are no longer living in harmony. Focusing on the material only leads us from the path of the Creator. We must now pray for ourselves and the people in a pitiful way. We must be humble and ask the Great Spirit to intervene because if we don’t, our children will continue to have troubles. They are acting out our behavior as adults. Today is a good time to start. We need to get the spiritual way back into our lives. We need to focus on the spiritual.

My Creator, help me to focus on the spiritual way.

http://whitebison.org/EldersMeditationApps.aspx

One Mans View On Building Stronger Boys

Published August 5, 2019 by tindertender

A society that shackles its boys’ natural tendencies towards understanding righteous violence will find that they grow into insecure young men who are obsessed with it as a means to validation.

Boys who are taught to defend themselves, and others, do not grow into monsters.

From their earliest ages, boys scrap with one another (or themselves, see above giphy, hehe) to:

– Establish hierarchy

– Give an outlet to energy

– Experience receiving, and giving, pain

– Build confidence in themselves

It is the last two that matter most.

A boy who has felt his fist crunch against the face of another boy never forgets that complex, primal rush of sensory experiences.

Nor does he forget what it’s like to be knocked down, or the exquisite and terrifying pain of having his nose broken.

As hard as it is for a parent, or the zero-tolerance schoolteachers, to see…fighting is a NECESSARY thing for a boy.

Pain is the ultimate teacher, and violence is the final answer.

Part of being a man is having the real, no-shit memory of conflict in his toolbox.

The confidence gained from surviving a fight, however small, changes a boy.

That black eye (properly framed by a male role model, at least) is a badge of honor.

The pain of healing is a reminder that he defended himself adequately, and lived to fight another day.

Boys who do not learn to reconcile the reality of violence – to harness it – are behind the masculinity curve for the rest of their lives.

Stronger men will take advantage of this.

So, too, will women.

The conflict-averse male is stepped on everywhere he turns.

The average boy is not a monster-in-waiting.

He’ll get in shoving matches, one or two of which will escalate to punches or wrestling.

Some boys will become bullies, pushing their pain onto others, usually because of a bad home life.

But neither of these types “just snaps”.

It is the quiet, submissive-seeming kid who snaps.

He’s usually picked on because he is less physically capable, not quite as handsome, certainly not popular.

He grows insecure, adding layers of depression and unreconciled emotional pain as the years carry forward.

In that darkness of insecurity, he nurses his grudges.

He fixates on the sources of his pain, and plays his killing-simulator video games (you think Call of Duty isn’t desensitizing kids to the wrong type of violence?!).

He becomes obsessed with weapons and makes plans.

The thing about firearms is that they are, by design, a neutral tool of “force multiplication”.

A frail, elderly woman can more readily protect herself against a high-testosterone violent felon.

So too, can a picked-on, downtrodden social misfit lash out at scale.

Social engineers want to make it about the gun, because that is viewed as an easy solution.

“JUST TAKE THE GUNS!”

But we also need to get rid of cars, knives, anything that can be used to harm or maim someone.

The will to commit mayhem will find a tool.

Rather, shouldn’t we find the courage as a society to let boys be boys?

To give them a little space to understand violence in a low-stakes way?

To quit loading them up with anti-depressants, when they mostly need a better diet, exercise, sunshine, and friends?

There’s a reason that the vast majority of these shooters fit a stereotype – frail, “nerdy”, loner, imbalanced emotionally, on meds, plays video games, etc.

Individually, none of these are predictive indicators.

But in concentration with one another, they paint a picture.

Collectively, they are the hallmarks of a kid who has received nothing but the wrong kind of pain.

Dumped on, forgotten, and hollowed out by rejection.

So they find an ideology or justification to hurt others.

And one day, the world will know their name…

This is an incredibly complex issue, and is nearly-unique to the United States.

Everyone has picked their reason based on their own projections – availability of firearms, bullies, culture of violence, “toxic masculinity” – and reverse engineered their conclusion.

The reality is, we’re into our second generation of boys being raised almost-exclusively by women.

In the home, in schools, in church.

Positive male role models are harder to come by.

This isn’t an attack on feminism, either.

That, too, is an easy, inadequate target.

A boy who is coddled into adulthood by the best intentions of women does not know how to process – to cope – with the inevitable reality of emotional, mental, and physical pain.

An exclusively-male influence produces a higher propensity for predatory violence.

A boy (or girl, but when was the last mass shooting event by a female in the US?), needs a primary masculine influence, blunted a little by the feminine.

He needs to fight, even just once.

He needs to be reinforced, not coddled.

Boys are not showing their weakness or lack of discipline when they fight.

They are learning how to forge their own chemistry, urges, and emotions into a tool of self-control and confidence.

Mothers, let your sons bleed a little.

Fathers, teach them to heal.

Gelding our boys does not ensure a safe society.

It increases the risk of mass violence by putting a cork in the bottle, increasing the pressure inside until the young man explodes.

His pain demands a response (credit to @mcclay_roman for that phrase).

We must build better men, or resolve to ourselves that mass violence will continue to increase in frequency and severity.

Or we can keep building soapboxes on the bodies of the innocent victims.

Our choice. Our future.

When I asked what his thoughts about how to turn this around, his response is: “Participation in a contact sport of some kind is a great start. Masculine camaraderie, ability to absorb and overcome physical/mental pain, and beneficial social proof all flow from this. Compulsory military service possibly, but I’m opposed to that for other reasons.” Thank you for permission to share your message Huntsman.

Is This The Great Experiment?

Published March 21, 2019 by tindertender

Why is someone always attacking the energy of the heart? How many heartbreaks can a human endure and still maintain ability to care, or better yet, to love still?

Love songs are so beautiful. Love is so beautiful! Love … has it been lost in a scar-filled Sky? Sometimes we can convince ourselves there is no more love. It can get depressing and suck the hope right out of a soul.

… But …

Love is real, and it IS still here despite the heartbreak, heart-ache and the shoving of destruction down our throats, every moment of every day by those who broadcast into homes. Choose wisely who you allow to influence your space. Occasionally at least, turn off the teli and dance, and sing about the love you once believed in … I hope you still do.

When things are right no one is messing with the weather or tweaking time. Outside influencers lose their reach and lose their hold over minds … once again Love, Joy and Family will be the most important thing on this earth.

No! I am not taking another walk down memory lane … I am moving forward! It seems many people are stuck in repetitive cycles of living in the past rather than purposefully creating a new and brighter future.

Is this life a race toward something … a goal? … or very important task? Humans fall constantly but continue to rise and progress. It is pretty incredible if deeply pondered, humans are so resilient!

I for one have never been good at pretending. I’ve never wanted to be good at pretending. I do not claim to have the answers, or what you need to fix your life. I’m simply living and sharing from the heart those thoughts which dwell in my mind.

We, all of us, are more alike than we could possibly imagine. If we are not willing to get to the core of who we are, to seek those traits that are buried deep in the subconscious of the psyche, truly seeing is not possible … and shallow assumptions and opinions are all that are born into the world. This practice of soul diving must begin in the mind, evaluating and examining the deepest part of self. From the mind this understanding develops in the heart, filling the self with a connection to that which is beyond time. Once that is done it becomes easier to see similarities between other people, aligning with our own reality. Separation simply falls away.

Some things must always be worked upon. Consistent effort need be applied to understanding if we are to smooth the current experience into something less traumatic. As a family this is the purest gift we can share with each other.

Who’s Sitting In The Chamber?

Published January 31, 2019 by tindertender

The mind is a tool. The body and blood and heart are all tools. Even consciousness itself may be a tool. But the mind cannot figure that out because … it’s only a tool.

How does consciousness, which is the human, use this tool called the mind? Do they? Or are their emotions controlling the mind? Tame the emotions, get the tool under wing. Be the enforcer. Only you are able to allow emotional dominance over mind. Once the emotions are trained, Pure Consciousness can then utilize the mind as intended.

As consciousness, I stand behind, and over my seated body. I caress the top of my head and acknowledge mind as my tool. All others who have in the past, or attempt to from this moment on … this is my avatar. Mine … period.

Interesting … inter-resting. This body is a resting place for others besides our own consciousness. Through life many of us, if not all people, pick up attachments, and can feel their influence. For a time it may have appeared they were utilizing emotion in order to influence the mind, slipping in through the back door. They use emotions to tweak the mind which allows them control of action. These emotional influences and ensuing actions, cause abundant and intense energy leaks, or flow, which can be utilized by those out of body to remain alive. (No one can really can’t blame them for desiring to exist).

Claim your tools! The ones you were born with. These are your tools. The others? They can watch you become master of your own tool box, your mind, heart and emotions. Practice sensing all influences, and limit them. Remember to do all things with love in your heart, this will keep the vibration lifted, and limit a ‘sinking’ into the pit called despair.

Who needs hundreds of beginnings and endings in an existence that never ends? Movies, dinner, work, rest, etc. All of these things have a beginning and an ending, as do many other activities and thought patterns. How silly is it that Pure Consciousness decided to sign up for these many starts and stops in this world of infinite choice?

Relax … stop for a time and just be.

Practice your sensing of energetic forms, distinguish yours from that of others, seen and unseen. Only by paying attention to these subtle energies will any kind of sense be made of this experience.

Silence is good, even when it is not silent.

Power Of Growth and Expansion

Published January 4, 2019 by tindertender

I might change my mind. I can do that. I am capable of, able, willing and loving to do that!

For awhile I thought I’d watch a movie, it’s Friday after all. Then I remembered I’m not real fond of the ‘programming’ … the shows, or the messages, so I built a nice cozy fire in the fireplace instead. It is crackling, and beautiful to my senses.

Sometimes I’ll make a plan, drive to where it leads me and change my plan just then, before even exiting my vehicle, driving away and doing something entirely different.

I am sad the hear there are those in this world who think someone else should “Pay the Penalty”. I think to myself, penalty for what? Isn’t it apparent that humanity has been paying a penalty for decades, even centuries? Heck, this penalty paying business may have started at the beginning of our life story … just as some claim it did.

Who to blame? The women? The ones who give birth to every single human being on this earth? No … there is a hatred for humanity which knows no borders and has no barriers … in this world or beyond. It is not gender specific, although one gender seems to be more pliable. Unfortunately this thing which has such hatred is also very good at manipulating angry, self-righteous, prideful minds … these are they who are most easily fueled, and led in some sort of action which harms others.

Humanity as a whole can bend and be formed by this ‘force’, or it can be aware of it and the tactics used … how these tactics feel when being applied, and how to stop the manipulation in its tracks.

Many good people worship Diety, by many different names. They claim there are rules and stipulations to coincide with these prayerful offerings … but these are made by humans … rules passed down generation after generation. At some point progression is needed if anything is to become improved upon.

This is true with any invention … say, the lawn mower, or egg beater, or tableware, or any number of things! As any device can be improved upon, so can very old ideals. Mind you, there are those things that should never be altered (glassware vs plastic) … but when old ideals segregate and harm any other life form then it should be visited, and transformed.

It really isn’t difficult to honor each other, especially when there is no one seeking to harm anyone. There will always be (seemingly) those ones who so desperately want to horde that which is good. My hope is for a quick, relatively painless transition.

Gaining control of personal thoughts and patterns is key to retaining solid connection with free will. Angry? Transmute that energy to love, or at least kindness. Are you ready to determine what kind of emotion you will allow to dwell in your body and mind and life? This choice is no easy task, it requires conscious, constant effort. This journey of controlling self is one of the most difficult.

Too often people put all of their effort into controlling the actions of others. They think if so and so, or this gender, or that group only did what they wanted them to do, or did not do what they did not want them to do, then they would be happy … satisfied. Yet, this is never the case, for no one can control the rest of the population. Sure, there are progressions made, but at some point, inevitably, there will be rejection of the imposing will and a practicing of the people’s own will … as it should be.

As in all things that are ever spoken or written by myself, I reserve the right to modify every single one of them. Like I said, I love to change my mind … utilizing the power of growth and expansion.

“Commit to being a hunter of excellence in yourself … You must master it and thereby transform; know that you cannot transform that which you have not experienced …”

~ David Morehouse, PhD

Sweet Surprises

Published December 13, 2018 by tindertender

I love it when I’m doing laundry and find money I didn’t know I had. The surprise of an extra $32 has me dreaming of what it will buy.

Another sweet surprise is the fact that working overtime is actually a pleasure. The company I now work for is like working for extended family, family you choose. While it gets dark outside and I’m still there, I am happy, knowing that I am doing all I can toward the success for all who spend so much of their time there.

I did not have to make dinner tonight … it was made for me. All I had to do was serve myself.

I squeezed in time to wash a load of laundry. That will be one less load I have to do this weekend.

The additional DMSO cream I purchased arrived today, making cuts and scrapes disappear quicker than ever before! My tattoo is nearly healed, ready for the finishing touches.

Peace has found me … or is it I who have found peace?

I hope it lasts this time … it seems after reprieve something always comes along to stretch capacity once more. These trials … I’d like to call them blessings, but to be honest, I do not know what the outcome will be when all is said and done.

Since uncertainty is the case, I set myself to counting blessings. When I get frustrated, I try to state inwardly a list of all that I am grateful for. This is an amazing practice that can turn a foul and dark situation into light once more, rather quickly too.

It can be difficult at times to find anything good in life, so it is best to start out ridiculously small … as in, I am grateful to be breathing … or I am grateful to have hair … or a jacket in the rain … or a fur baby who adores me … or sight, to see the patterns in the sky, or rocks, or in anything at all … or the ability to hear, or taste, or sense that which seems to be beyond the visual.

I am grateful for the capacity to choose to be calm, when at one time I would rage. I am grateful to be at the point of recognizing myself in others … some at a stage I once was at, some at a stage where I aspire to be some day.

I am grateful for life … this blessing that is often difficult to comprehend.

This treasure …

What Is Your Breaking Point?

Published December 9, 2018 by tindertender

What is your breaking point?

What have you done when you’ve arrived there?

My breaking point came a few times in this life. The last one actually nearly cost my physical life, it surely did cause a ‘rebirth’ in my spiritual life, and a complete shift in the way I think and live.

Strength is born out of these times, when the world seems to crash down on our heads. It isn’t uncommon for a person to fall, then swim in the affects of previous actions. It can seem like drowning, dying, or make us wish we would, and sometimes that is exactly what happens.

For those times a person is able to crawl out of that deep well into the light of day once more they will find that a portion of them is left behind. That portion of them which caused the fall in the first place is shed, and newness is birthed to fill the space left from its removal.

Falling enough times, or falling so deep, and then the fight that ensues to come back to light, is indeed a rebirth … you may not even recognize yourself. You may find that many others will tell you, “This isn’t the you I remember.” Embrace it … especially if the layers of pain, which perpetuated pain I this world, are left behind.

Be bold in the creation of a new you … society no longer dictates who you will be … YOU do. This is your story now.

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