Defining Self

Published August 28, 2018 by tindertender

Photo by Andrei Lazarev

How many people still equate “who they are” with their physical body, their job, or their possessions? Although I honestly believe the number is on the decline, there are still many who think of these things ‘as them’.

It can be difficult to look deep in to ones own psyche and take a good long, hard, honest look at what is there. Personally, I think those individuals who have are those who may be depressed … at first (been there). Yet it is also they who show the utmost bravery, for it takes a tremendous amount of courage to see truth, raw and bare. (The key is to not allow any other person define who we are).

Youth, remembering it I see clearly the flippant cocky way I once behaved. When I experience the same behavior from others today, it takes me right back. I think to myself, there must be a reason I’m being exposed to this right now … what have I to learn that I haven’t yet learned from those days? So I ponder it …

Not so much focused on what was said by another, but what I said … then, and now. What do my actions of past, and my responses of present have to teach me?

Well, I can assure you life is one grand affair! To be able to say I was young and naive, then hurt and depressed, beaten to the ground, then a fighter … cocky and … dare I say, cruel? Then lost in twilight zone, to now. Rebirthed, new, yet filled with so many memories of these roles I’ve held. So funny, and odd, to see an aspect of my younger self in action today, as a male no less!

It seems I am different, and I am, yet the memories remind me of what I hold inside, that which has formed my current reality.

And still, there are those in this world which make it their mission to tear down people, too afraid to tear down their own psyche, bust their egoic person right open and create a kinder, more connected, gentler self. Or perhaps they are still, only too stubborn, unable to see.

The day will come, if they make it. So many do not …

I’m curious what tomorrow brings for this world. I see the whole. It is so much bigger than my personal world … than any ‘personal space’.

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