“You’re welcome to stay.” That’s all he said. I pondered the idea of it and wondered what the options were/are.
This world is diseased, everything is infected. Try as we do to maintain joy, it is elusive, and when finally realized, quickly morphs into something not quite as pleasant.
Considering past experience, I may have to pass … although a solitary stroll among the trees is wonderful, and sitting at rivers edge very soothing.
There must be something more … something as of yet unknown. Would one honestly opt to stay and repeat this scenario, working to alter the dramatic poisoning of this world (seemingly impossible), or would it be easier to gamble and see what lies behind doors 1, 2, and 3? Would one have to choose without knowing what was beyond?
Leap of faith … many of us have probably heard that phrase ‘sometimes you just have to take a leap of faith’. Is it true in the end? When determining the rest of eternity, do we leap, or do we return to what we know, what we’ve become accustomed to, even though it can be quite painful?
Perhaps once the body quits us, we have opportunity to see our loved ones from the past who remain in body, and maybe we long to be with them still, so we return. Maybe that leap of faith is what we are here to train for, always reaching beyond what we currently know, to learn something new, to hopefully improve our knowledge.
May there be many years before I leave to learn what it’s about, out there (or maybe learning will not require leaving). My learning the hard lessons will be valuable someday, somewhere, somehow. I wonder if in the end I’ll say, “Dammit!! I know I can do better!!” and revisit physicality again.
“Let me ask you this.” And the question never comes … I stop listening for it and direct my attention elsewhere.
To intentionally direct the attention takes great inner resolve, it is most difficult, and with practice becomes a little easier as time passes.
Now I relax and ready for bed. My four day weekend begins in the morning, maybe I’ll be inspired to journey outside and find some tools I would like to work with. I’ll be painting awesome rocks before you know it.