As my eyes open and my mind expands I shake my head, and I wonder … Are you real? Or did I imagine it, was it only a dream? I no longer have a firm conviction as this reality shifts.
Oh how I long to hear you, or be in the midst of the very large presence that is you. Now … I truly do feel alone, as I cannot tell anymore.
There are those who continuously wear away at my beliefs. They choose to knowingly cause confusion, toying with my mind and heart.
I will do my best to prevail, although I do not know why. Just when I think I have a grasp on the purpose of life, it leaves me and becomes unclear.
I get angry.
I do not want to be angry.
Yet those who are abusive need to be stopped.
How do I do that?
How do I do this without becoming that which I despise?
Have I already become that?
I do not know.
I must hold to Hope … Hope that even in my confusion you are there, and you will catch me when I fall, for I will indeed fall, I have many times.
I am stronger now, at least I tell myself this. I like to think that even though I’ve come to realize I don’t really know anything, that it will be alright … in the end. I believe that I am guided to do what is right, not through manipulation or sneaky tactics, but out of love … good honest Soul Love.
There is just no room for shoddy impersonations.
Out of all negatives are flips into positives. Even though darkness deals in coercion and thinks they have the upper hand, it isn’t known to them they are indeed assisting the Light.
Here I am … Reaching for the Sun.